What's the best Auto "Sayings"/Mantra's

It's a 50/50 car.... looks good from 50 feet at 50 mph.

 

it don't have to be pretty if is fast

 

Oh yeah, forgot this one:

"I'll show ya mine if you'll show me yours!"

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leave whats well alone,

 

"I'd rather have a sister in a whorehouse than a friend driving a Ford"

"I've been to 3 world fairs and a goat fuckin' contest, and I ain't never seen no shit like that!"

"Drink till she's cute, but stop before the wedding"

FISHDO - Fuck It, Shit Happens, Drive On

Urinary Olympics (pissing contest)

Testicular Fortitude (big balls)

"Colder'n a witches tit in a brass bra doing pushups in the snow"

"I'll be on you like white on rice on a paper plate in a snowstorm"

 

Raceing is a DISEASE..only poverty will cure.....

 

I like watermelon.

 

"You can't beat cubic money"
"Chrome wasn't built in a day"
"Poked and stroked, no joke"

GTO - Get Tools Out

 

- Middle Age - When you want to see how long your car will last instead of how fast it will go


- this car converts cash $$ into noise~~!

 

"never judge a person by the kind of car they live in"

 

"keep it up and i'll burn your house down to the rims! "

 

If you cant race it or take it to bed,it aint really worth having?

I've got the gas, You got the guts?

 

heard this from my Dad a million times on a lousy paint job:

"...sanded with a brick, painted with a broom..."

overheard at Carlisle about a "cheap" ratrod for sale:

"...yeah, I got sold a cheap cat one time...it didn't look pregnant..."

 

...just saw these two on a another thread:

"PATINA: ONE OF A KIND PAINT THAT ONLY TIME CAN CREATE"

"THAT THING IS THE TITS AS IT SITS!"

 

You can't polish a turd....cause it just gets you shitty.

(when I worked at a dealership and the problem was getting the best of us we used to say..)It's almost quitting time and my car runs!

 

I used to be a parts guy and I always told the techs when they came to the back window wanting to know if their special ordered part was in yet...

'I'll be here when it arrives'

and...'if you don't like it, here's a dollar, go buy yourself an ice cold can of shut the hell up.'

 

Seen on the back of sprint car t-shirt
dying of natural causes is for pussys

 

An old boss of mine used to say...

"I'm fucking this cat, you're just holding its head"

 

My first Boss would sometimes ask, "How long you been workin' here Boy, Not countin' tomorrow?"

Drive it like Ya stole it.

Tight is right, Too tight is broke.

Painting is like Fucking. If you did a good job, Ya got some on Ya.

How's My Driving? Call 1-800-EAT-SHIT

"Anyone get killed in that Wreck?" "Naw, but a gal got cut in the backseat"

Get in, Sit down, Shut up, and Hold on.

Bodymen can Keep it Straight.

I was looking for a Job, when I found this one, so Fuck You, I Quit.

She shines like Dime in a goats ass.

She ran when I parked her. (20yrs ago)

 

PONTIAC: Poor old Negro thinks its a Cadillac.

Hey, don't blame me for bring politically incorrect, this is from a comedy sketch.

Any here's one for the environmentalists:

"The solution to pollution is dilution"

 

thanks henry, i knew the pontiac one but i was afraid the whole negro part would cause an issue :/ haha it is a funny one though

 

up here is norweigen but we mostly have shades of white

 

Dodge: If you can't Dodge it Ram it.

 

.........

 

Dont know, if we already had this one:

Never touch a running system.....
Or: if it runs, leave it the fuck alone......

 

Whatever;

Floats yer boat
Trips yer trigger
dingles yer dangle..

Fuck it; Paint it..

VonDad

 

How about you put yer money where your mouth is

 

When you start to work on that old car at least one and probably half of the rusty nuts and bolts are going to have to be cut,torched,sawed and cursed apart, skinning a knuckle in the process...

 

Then let's not forget;

Some come to sit and think
Others come to shit and stink
But I come to scratch my balls
And read the writing on the shithouse walls

 

One I live by when my buddies ask if my wife knows what something costs: " It's easier to ask for forgiveness than permission"