What's the Most Absurd Claim you've heard at a Car Show, Drag Race, Cruise Night, etc

A couple of my favorites that I have been involved in:

one night while out cruisin, I had parked my '62 Chevy truck on the side of the road to go chat it up with all my gearhead pals. After a while, we decided to go for a cruise, and on the way back to my truck, still parked flat on the ground in all of it's primerd glory, I noticed Douchey McJackoff next to it pointing out the rear suspension. I decided to listen in for a moment as he explained to two girls how air ride works, and how cool his truck is. I then walked over and said, "man, this is a nice truck!" He started to thank me as I opened the door, started it, aired up the 'bags and drove off.

The next one was bullshit told my friends and I.

Another night while out cruising with my buds, we were all standing around my buddies 383 four-speed '66 Belvedere. This kid walks up and starts talking with us and telling us about how he went Wyotech and how he is going to be a mechanic. Then he started asking about the car. When James told him the motor was a 383, his response was "so you put a chevy motor in it."
Not as a question, but a statement.
We couldn't let this guy get away. We told him it was a Chevy, but we put a distributor relocation kit in it.

 

"Man, I usta have a car just like this, wrapped it around a telephone pole." Is that why these guys always USED to have a car "just like this"?

 

"I bet this will be on the HAMB"

 

A guy I used to work with swears he had a '48 Thunderbird convertible.
Another guy I was talking with about COPO Chevys tells me his brother special ordered a '71 Chevy C10 with a 426 Hemi

 

At my Military tech school in 1977, it seemed everyone there had the baddest hot rod in the country back home in their garage.
One example was a dude with a street legal 68 charger, he had a 440 in it, and said it would run 8 second 1/4 miles all day.
Another had an old coupe, stuck a 327 in it that he built to 13 to 1 compression, put a 3/4 cam, and a 6-71 blower.
Me thinks some of them were reading too much magazine.
And, over the years, I have had several people that have told me point blank that Pontiac never actually built the OHC 6 cylinder, despite the fact I have shown them a picture of the one in my '67 Firebird, and even offered to show the real engine to them. Currently work with one guy who swears I am full of shit about it, but doesn't have time to come and see it in my garage.

 

I heard a guy, I know his name but I'm not goin to mention it, tell one of my friends that he built the '58 Plymouth Savoy that I watched my father build over a 4 year period. He bought it from my dad, painted it red and tried to pass it off as his own work, good thing customs are one of a kind.

 

This was a valid statement, My T bucket with T headlights and 1157 bulbs was real easy to outrun the headlights. 100+ mph with lights that lit the road 150 feet was not a good thing.

 

I heard this at Firebird Raceway in Boise, Idaho
"So what year is it?"
"It's an all original, Fiber Glass, '32."
The kid was racing his dad's '32 but couldn't race it because one, he said it didn't have a firewall and due to the NOS system they installed, they needed a roll cage. I love me some all original fiber glass '32s!!!

"If I was doing any less, I'd be doing nothing at all"

 

There is more to being a hot rodder than just owning one...

 

+1 for the best thing I've heard in some time...

 

We did too! Do we know you?

 

I don't know if I feel lucky or worse then. We'll be out driving our '39 chevy and have people ask us what year VW it is. The sad part is that it has happened more than once...

 

And then they say they drove it clear from some long distance far far away. The worst part is that they usually get long distance awards or something studpid like that. What's worse is when they get parked next to a car also from far away with paint chips and bugs all over the grill and bra and then have the balls to tell the person who actually drove their car how much they just love to drive their car.

 

Bra?!! Shouldn't be bras of any kind anywhere near a hot rod.

 

Some women just have to wear one, so thats OK with me

 

It seems like every sorry ass who comes into our shop has to tell us about his $50,000 Nova that runs 10's and wins trophies everywhere it goes. It never fails, once they can't think of anything else stupid to ask, out comes the Nova stories. They all have $12,000, 1000 horse big blocks, pull the front wheels and amazingly they're always someplace far away but, "we're gonna go get it and bring it down here". It's gotten to the point where one of our shop "house rules" is, don't talk about your Nova.

 

Old guy looking at my nosed and decked 54 chev 4 dr. Sittting in the weeds with 54 Olds flipper caps and flat black. Guy says he just loved it and had one just like it when he was young. only it was a 36 Dodge roadster and it was blue!!!

 

I guess I should say that I myself did tell a big one ONCE. I was up all night with a friend of mine priming my 54 chev 2dr black. We decided it needed flames. So we flamed it. Went to the Sherwood cruise with a bunch of friends. Hangin out and what not. Most people walked by saying it was cool. This one woman walks right up to me and starts bitching me out. Saying it was criminal and I should be shot. How could I do that. ECT ECT. Everyone is starting to stare. She just kept asking how could I do that. So finally I told her. I said that when I left the shop this morning the flames were on the car the right way, but some bitch in a Honda pulled out in front of me, I hit the brakes, the flames flipped over backwards. And I dont have enough horse power to flip them back!!!!! Needless to say she shut up.



How do I post pics????? Kind of new at this

 

a few years ago i had a 68 fairlane 500, my wife and i had drivin it to the local cruise night, parked the car and went to get something to eat. when we returned to the car, 2 guys were looking very closely at the tail lights. one of the guys turns to me and says the car has the wrong tail light lenses. i replied, "they fit dont they". he replied "they are wrong for the year of the car". i asked him to go away.

 

My dad has worked at a parts store over 40 years, he has heard alot of them. The one that sticks out the most is how a guy had bought plugs and wires and a cap and rotor. He came back later and he asked the guy how his car ran and he said it ran pretty good but not perfect and he realized he had left the rotor out. Some people?

 

The jackass that came up to my truck in Ft Worth and proceeded to tell the guy next to him he built my truck. Hated that we or whomever, had changed so many things. Then he proceeds to claim it must have been stolen since the stock tailights had been changed (they were stock).

I then recognized the truck he was talking about, and it took 5 minutes to show him it was not the same as mine.

 

I had a guy buy one of my cars that I had built everything! construction, paint, upholstery, drivetrain, everything.... Well.... The next week I saw the car at a show and "His" reader board claimed he built the entire car! He even argued to a friend of mine of 'His' build.... eventually 'he' won a trophy at that show, and I was called up to receive it instead of him... He really pissed of a few people and got caught!

 

every local show there is a guy with a sign that must be 5 foot long that says, "SHO IS FAST" taped to the aluminum pro mod wing.

 

Quote:
<TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=6 width="100%" border=0><TBODY><TR><TD class=alt2 style="BORDER-RIGHT: 1px inset; BORDER-TOP: 1px inset; BORDER-LEFT: 1px inset; BORDER-BOTTOM: 1px inset">Originally Posted by Mazooma1
One guy with a pretty nice '60 Chevy with a 409 was telling us how he ran low on brake fluid and poured milk, yes milk, into the brake cylinder to allow him to get home from the beach, some 40 miles.
Everyone was slack-jawed listening to this stuff. I was about 16 at the time but the smell of bullshit was in the air.
Funny thing was, though, is the guy was a straight shooter and always was really smart mechanically...so the story stuck with many of the listeners because of that.
</TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE>
Milk would work...I fixed a head gasket with eggs


I bought this car, and when I crashed it, the cylinder head smashed the master cylinder and we survived by eating omelette for 5 days in an Arizona desert.

 

Quote:
<TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=6 width="100%" border=0><TBODY><TR><TD class=alt2 style="BORDER-RIGHT: 1px inset; BORDER-TOP: 1px inset; BORDER-LEFT: 1px inset; BORDER-BOTTOM: 1px inset">Originally Posted by Mazooma1
One guy with a pretty nice '60 Chevy with a 409 was telling us how he ran low on brake fluid and poured milk, yes milk, into the brake cylinder to allow him to get home from the beach, some 40 miles.
Everyone was slack-jawed listening to this stuff. I was about 16 at the time but the smell of bullshit was in the air.
Funny thing was, though, is the guy was a straight shooter and always was really smart mechanically...so the story stuck with many of the listeners because of that.
</TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE>
Milk would work...I fixed a head gasket with eggs


I bought this car, and when I crashed it, the cylinder head smashed the master cylinder and we survived by eating omelette for 5 days in an Arizona desert. I told you a million times not to exagerate!!!

 

I remember one from a few years ago, when Superformance released the Cobra Daytona Coupe replica (http://www.superformance.com/coupe.aspx). From memory it was at the Sydney Motor show (?) there was one on display, being a HUGE fan of the original Daytona Coupe I was having a good long look and talking to the salesman. I must have struck him as someone that would buy one as he invited me to sit in it and gave me all the costs and paperwork on them.
While stepping over the low barrier I overheard a young bloke (Maybe 18) telling his mate how stupid they were for making a replica of them. I'm paraphrasing here but it was followed by something like this,
"My dad has an original one and I see them all the time, but these don't have a back seat"
With only 6 real ones built I have to wonder how one managed to slip into Australia and when did they have a back seat? I wonder if his dads was the ultra rare 240Z Daytona Coupe.
Doc.

 

I was at a show and a kid comes up and asks why I didn't have a hood. I told him I was old and forgot it. then I pointed to my friends 32 roadster and told the kid that guy is older then me he forgot the fenders.

 

Kid I worked with who has a Acura RSX: "Me and my dad did (random ricer mods) to it and now it goes 12s. We race every weekend at PIR."

Me: "Cool. I'll have to go down there and check it out."

Him: "Well, we won't be there this week."

 

At which point I always ask "Then why did you park it?"

 

I told one only once. I was sitting at a show next to a hamb member righboyroadsters car. It has a 40 Ford dash. This know itall came by talking trash about all the cars then he stops and looks at the dash in Johns 32. So I tell him it's a 32 deluxe with the round dash vary rare he walks off telling his buddy's yea thy only made 400 of those deluxe's in 1932.