What's the Most Absurd Claim you've heard at a Car Show, Drag Race, Cruise Night, etc

Hell,he didn't even go as far as top have it done,which is why that video pisses me off.Seriously,who did he think he was fooling other than the 16 year old babby boppers that listen to his crappy bands?I'm surprised Johnny D never said anything about it,but then again,Travis probably lined Johnny's pockets pretty well for that Cad.Hell,Travis even own's the "El Conquistador" '67 Eldorado.These cars just sit and go to shit once he owns them too

 

There was one kid in the late 60's who's daddy bought him a 427 Chevelle.
The kid was telling eveyone at the gas sttion one night how he had to take the two four-barrels off and replace them with one carb because the car ran out of a full tank of gas within 10 miles...10 miles.

 

Heard of a go kart that beat a Lamborghini on a track,laughed,then saw it happen on a video..Stopped laughing and now I want one.

 

Ever notice how everyone's car that they no longer have was a 12 second car?

 

the last car show fiasco i attended the guy parked next to me kept telling folks his 72 duster came from the factory with a wedge when in fact it was a 318 , it was interesting to notice the ones who knew and the ones that didnt!

on another interesting note duster dork liked my big block and blower!

 

one step for man...one giant leap for mankind

 

exactly..Van allen radiation belt?..and many other complete fuck ups..please

 

wow, really?

http://www.snopes.com/quotes/internet.asp

the real story and how he was misquoted and taken out of context...

my best friend from high school races shifter karts, they hold more lap records on road courses world wide than any other vehicle.

 

I had my dad's 49 Hudson Brougham at a local cruise night. I had stepped away from the car to wonder the grounds and returned to find some jack ass leaning against the car telling someone he owned the car and did all the work. What was even better as he refered to the car as a Mercury

 

Just remembered one from the so-called pro's, at that.
Years ago, early in my hot rod days, I took my '69 Fairlane to a local Meineke, to do duals, and put Flowmasters on it ( this was the REAL early days of Flowmasters, just arrived, hot ticket...). I went back to pick up the car, its still on the lift, I'm looking at the mufflers...hmmmm..."Inlet"...probably should face the front, huh?
Called 'em on it, they said: "Ohhh, yeah, its fine we do 'em like that all the time" Said to guy: "excuse me, I'll be right back, I go call Flowmaster, and inquire as to whether this is the case, or not. Flowmaster tech guy ( laughing...): "They do WHAT"?! "NO"!!!
I went back and told 'em Flowmaster said they put that shit on there for a reason, so I don't really care how you install anyone elses, but you can cut mine back out and turn 'em the right way around...

 

In reference to my coupe, continuously: "Nice Roadster"!

 

yea those things are brutal, you need nuts the size of basketballs to drive one at full speed.

 

Not a hot rod, but a daily driver I bought had the "check engine" light on the dash come on. I took it to the dealer from which I bought the car and the service manager said that the light just malfunctioned and came on for no reason. I asked if he could turn the light off and he said, "oh man, we can, but you'll have to leave it overnight. To turn the trouble light off, we have to completely remove the dashboard"....
I left with it on and took it to a small auto repair shop and the mechanic put some electronic gizmo on the pigtail under the dash and "Bingo" turned off the light...he didn't even charge me. He said "I can't charge you for something that took me 30 seconds to fix". I've been going to that mechanic ever since.

 

some service people need to be beaten.

 

I was helping out at my Brothers vendor booth at last weekends World of Wheels car show. These events are usually good for a few whoppers. This past event was different, everyone who stopped to talked was reasonably serious about what they were doing. Then a 4 pack of young men stopped by. One of them wanted to know what gears he should put in his 99 Mustang for better "squeel" off the line. We always ask what engine, trans and what horsepower they plan to run or currently have. The answer was "Oh, about 1000 horse". His buddies immediately hooted and danced and made a few reassuring comments (And a couple of wanna be gang signs)to show they were associated with this "Bad dude" and his car. 1000 horse eh ?? Turbo ? - No, Procharger ? - No... "I got NOSS man" (God I hate it when they call it that...) After further interogation it was determined that he was running a 555 BBF with 3 stages of "NOSS". Apparently this bad machine is capable of running "9s man..." Now that he had our interest we kept asking about his combination. It turns out the car has "full race factory" trans, "full race factory" rear, bags and billet Boyd 20's all around and 4 video screens (I threw up a little in my mouth) He went on to tell us how he drag races it all the time at NHRA National events where he usually wants to run Pro Stock (??) but his car is too fast (???) so they make him run exhibition only. (Pardon???) Pro-Stock - Really - "Yah Man Pro-f'n Stock but the f'rs won't let me run cuz I'm too f'n fast"

I can't tell you how serious this kid was. Even his "posse" was backing him with stories of his ferocious burnouts on the street and his undefeated street racing title. (I'm thinking he was probably undefeated on Grand Theft Auto on one of his video screens) So we had to ask, if his car is too fast for pro stock and can run 9s why does he want gears to give him more "Squeel" off the line? His car shopuld be capable of incinerating those 20s with ease. He explained (Wait for it...) that he has a switch that changes the gear in the back from street to race and the street gear doesn't squeel enough when he dumps the clutch.

Even after we advised him we know the difference between shit and shine-ola, build serious race cars and drag race every second weekend, he still stuck to his story. My brother finally had had enough, called him and his crew idiots and turned to a potential customer.

Later in the show, the owner of one of the performance shops in town came by giggling. He had to tell us the story of the kid running pro stock with the 1000 horse tuner style mustang who was complaining to him that we had no clue about performance drivetrains. Apparently , they called them an idiot as well...

 

Yup, the only thing worse than knowing nothing is saying that you know it all.

 

I had a 12 second truck once, and every once in awhile I'd even get it to start in under 9 seconds...sa-weet!

 

Well, the "service manager" is just doing his job, he is there to seperate the customer from the mechanic so the damned mechanics won't be able to tell the customers the truth!
But you knew that. That's the premise of most dealerships' policies, more than not. Many forbid contact between the customer and the technician. (yea, I know, that's a rant, not on topic) but the devil made me do it..

Another Off topic, at a tire shop. Last summer got new tires installed, when they rolled it out it had long-assed stems sticking out, sure to be clipped off with the first curb contact. Answer to my complaint; "Oh I put them on there on purpose so it's easier to air them up"

Yea, right.
.

 

An off-topic ride, but a friend told me that he has a friend that had a Honda Civic and he swapped to the motor out of a Honda Pilot and he claimed he could beat Corvette's in it. Now, my friend doesn't know all that much about cars, so I don't think he realized how stupid he sounded, but he's probably just taking his friend at his word, too bad he doesn't know better...

 

it's possible to swap those engines but it's not going to beat a corvette. I know people who have ones that can,but it wasn't just dropping in a motor, takes a lot of work and tuning to do that. as for all these guys bragging about running ten second street civics, there are ten second civics,but they are drag cars,not street cars, and they don't have tv's in the head rests, or stereos that can be heard from 6 blocks away. there is someone i know on the honda accord forum I belong to who is running a ten second 86 accord hatchback, but it's a tube frame car with two giant turbochargers on the front,along with all the other serious gear that is required to go that fast. no NOSSSS or tv's or other crap, I have to laugh my ass off at the kids who claim their street civics can go that fast. he's swapped in an H22 now,that is built for the drag strip, he's currently dynoing at close to 600 ponies, thats with the boost dialed down. maby he will make some of these ricer wannabes wet their pants when he's got it back on the track. drag car yes,street car? no way,not by dropping in an engine. maby he can get some of those gears that switch by flipping a switch? lol.

 

Maybe one of the tires sprung a leak...

 

okay i read 166 posts, now i am only 21, I never talk like a know it all, but i am here to learn.
Well all know these bullshitters, tiny dicks make big shits.
a little off topic but its a dumb ass story anyways
I was in my friends 80's ford crown vicky, and we were driving back to his place. Its the middle of winter in canada so a brisk -18. The engine keeps dying, wait a few minutes and starts up again. The mechanic at the oilfield shop (where we had to get his pay cheque before getting drunk for the evening) says oh the battery must not be charging. So we shut it off put the charger on it, wait 15 minutes and hope it makes it back to his place. This is out in the country by the way average 1-5 miles walk to the nearest house. We make it 12 miles before it dies, then it starts up again. I asked him if the car was over heating. "nope checked all the fluids yesterday they are all topped up". To wrap up after slowly and steadily and several engine dies later we make it to his place. I open the hood after its cooled down, ask him to fire it up, power tester in hand. Not 10 seconds later the top radiator hose sucks together. Turns out not a single drop of antifreeze in it. Thank god it was winter kept the engine cold i guess.

My other highschool friend was the mister know it all on engines. He insisted that his 1980's Chev half ton's 350 stock motor had 290-320 horsepower. If he bolted on after market headers and a k and N airfilter he would have close to 400. Now i am a young guy and correct me if i am wrong but. Those trucks only had 190 horsepower new, and he bagged the shit out of his

 

-With my 49 F1-
Guy: Oh this sure is a nice restored truck. Even has the original flathead huh?
Me: *Wide eyed and looking down at the 70's 454* No sir, thats a big block chevy.
Guy: These trucks didnt come with BBCS!

-With my 84 monte carlo-
*Guy with ditzy blond sitting next to him in a clapped out CRX*
Guy: hey, wanna open that rust bucket up?
Me: No, its just a stupid V6.
Guy: Oh come on shithead.
Me: *pissed mash the pedel at green and pull away from him like hes not even trying, but he was*
Guy: WTF was that, you didnt tell me when!

-Towing my 53' cadillac to the shop-
*As im getting towed by my dad with a nylon tow strap attatched to his 97' GMC*
**Guy next to me in traffic**
"See, thats why old cars are not arround much anymore, then are so slow they need to be towed."
Then later on by another person.
"Does your car not work?"
Me: No, gas prices are getting so bad i had to get a ride with a friend.

 

You know what is worse? I went to a car show where someone had a real Cobra (289) and almost half the people there would point it out to their GF, kids, friends etc... and say it was a replica and that there was no way that it was real. Stuff like "Look at the panel fit, obviously a hack job", " look at that SBC, with the Ford valve covers on it", and my favorite "Carol Shelby would kick his ass if he saw him trying to claim that as a real Cobra", not knowing that he had all the documentation, including papers from Carol himself sitting with the car if they only took the time to read the stuff.

The guy took it in stride, and gave me a ride because I recognized it as the real deal and enjoyed talking to him about it.

 

Regarding his 72 Duster

....Oh no Sir, she's a driver...hell, I put 1000 miles on her in the past year alone...

(Seen on 'My Classic Car' tv show this morning...)

 

Obviously, he had to put it in reverse at track end to slow it down

 

I had in interesting conversation, it was a local neighbour.

Him " what kind of car is that ?"
I " 1964 Humber Super Snipe" (says all the was across the hood, right in front of where he was standing)
Him "oh i didnt know Hummer made cars"
I "no its a 1964 Humber Super Snipe, it was a british made car, that was bought out by car company named rootes arrow, and later by Chrysler"
Him "No Hummer is owned by Chevrolet"
I " Yes this is a H-u-m-b-e-r"
Him "so whats it got under the hood'
I "factory straight six with power steering, power brakes, discs up front, all factory"
Him" Wow i didnt know there was a straight six hemi"
( the spark plugs are in the center of the head and its a overhead cam quite interesting)

Needless to say he walked away learning that Hummer made cars before going military i guess.

 

O SHIT... My dad used to tell me that EXACT story about a friends car...

Guy I know, and for whatever reason, always "has" whatever it is that you're talking about, and I don't care what it is. Hemi under glass? Yea, I got one of those, it's at the farm, to much work to get it. Hemi engines? Shoot, I got more of those than I know what to do with. RC helicopter? Shoot, I made one from scratch 10 times nicer and bigger than that one, fires real bullets too. Also, to much work to get or look at. Same guy drives around in a seriously beat to crap econoline van that he's owned for 15 years.

Funny part is if anybody local to me reads this.... they're gonna know who I'm talking about... ...lol...

I had a basic chevy pickup with a mild 350 in it (was a solid 16 second truck in the quarter), came with some crazy salt flat style road gears. I had it re-geared so it would pull a trailer real nice, but never changed the speedometer gearing. I sold it. the owner finds me about a week later,
Guy, "MAN, that truck really hauls ass"
Me, " What do you mean?"
Guy, " I punched it and was going over 70mph before we got through the intersection..."
Me, "yea, it was a good runner...." (I didn't have the heart to tell him)

later, some dudes tell me the tale how 4 of them loaded into a Maverick with a stock 302 in it, after installing a 3/4 race cam... It's runnin mid 11's in the 1/4 with all of them in the car, according to the one dudes watch.

 

The guy parked behind me at Del Mar told me my car was a rat rod because it was low.....

I immediatly replied and hurt his feelings..........