why do we get so attached???? my brother SCRAPPED my first hot rod!!!

Here's a 5 cent analysis. Can you ever remember anytime when your brother was a real human being? Maybe when you were kids? It can be upsetting when you realize that some people don't care as much about the things you care about. It's hurts emotioonally when you realize someone you care about does not return that same care. What are brothers for but ot love one another. It's more than the stuff. Your brother doen't even seem to care about himself and that is a real upsetter.

I wish you luck and divine guidance if necessary.

 

kick his ass!!

 

He took your trailer and scrapped your stuff. He owes you money, and a bunch of it. Go over there and demand it. And don't leave until he does.
He knew what he was doing when he did it. There's NO WAY he thought you wouldn't care--something is driving him to screw family. Maybe it's drugs, maybe he's sober and is really just a self-centered asshole who only cares about himself. I'd demand the money he got for scrapping your property, tell him you'll never loan him anything again (and stick to it), and wait and see if he apologizes. If he does, and it's heart-felt, then accept it and move on. If he starts justifying his actions by saying it was just old stuff, you were never going to do anything with it, etc. etc. etc., then fuck him. People like that will never change.
There are plenty of families who don't get along--sounds like you and your brother have been screwed by him a lot over the years. Write him off, before you lose more.
-Brad

 

Write him out of your will.

 

Where's he at? I'll drive up there and kick his ass myself!

 

bummer...I am steaming just thinking if one of my brothers did that to me...

 

After this, and knowing my brother-in-law, I second that motion.

My credo is family has nothing to do with blood, it's about love and respect. You don't have that, and blood is just water. Family is who you make it. And personally an ipshit like that wouldn't be family.

 

I would have to break into a state prison to do that....

 

that's all I can say- not just the fact that so many good components were scrapped, but that you lost all faith in your brother. I can't imagine how bad that hurts, my brother and I are very close, and he ever did anything like that, man, it would be on. My dad and uncle are the same way, they used to be really close, but my uncle is very hard headed, and does stuff, sometimes intentionally, to hurt my dad. Now that my uncle has cancer we've all gotten over the past, hope it doesn't have to happen that way for you though. Sorry.

 

i agree go take some of his stuff.

 

Wow!!! Benzine, There's a kick in the pants to all us "spoiled little brothers".

Of course it's exactly the opposite in my case as my older brother sounds exactly like this clown - stealing from family.

The really SAD part here is the supposed bond of brotherhood is so easily shattered for a couple of lousy dollars. I haven't spoken to my only (older) brother in many many years. I am not proud of this fact, but being the ass gasket that he is this is sadly much better than having the drama of his life spoil my and my family's (wife and kids).

As a brother you can reach a level of disgust and walk away from a sibling with minimal regret, but the family never seems to be able to forgive EITHER of you - well that's my experience anyways. Family's have a way at dividing the blame equally while they become "enabler's". The "lousy brother" always seems able to zone in on this fact and fully exploit it for everything it's worth. sad really.

For those who have a "good" or "ok" brother - feel extremely lucky - for there are those of us who truely do envy you - I know I do.

In the end the only good I take from these situations is to become acutely aware of the relationship between my kids - making sure they RESPECT one another is not an option in my house - it is DEMANDED.

If your brother (and mine) had ANY respect whatsoever they wouldn't have ever even considered stealing from family (much less anyone else).

Try and see what "good" there is in this situation and make the best of it. If your brother is "saveable" do something NOW as you can take it from me - it will only get worse if left unchecked. If on the other hand he is a bad seed - then cut your losses now.

I really do feel for ya.

 

Mike that sucks, best advice I can give. Let it go! Easy to say...hard to do.

 

disown his dumb ass.. i havent talked to my older brother in 4 years cuase hes the same way.. ( the same situation just with larger money items)as far as im concerned the faster hes dead the better. and one things for sure ill never talk to him again as long as i live..

 

my god, if my brother sold my project (which is in his garage) i would probably burn his house to the ground. That is terrible what your brother did, it makes my heart sink thinking about it.

 

HRambler

Wow!!! Benzine, There's a kick in the pants to all us "spoiled little brothers".

Well, I speak as a spoiled little brother so I understand the family dynamic involved. I never pulled anything along this order of magnitude though.

My bothers are 5 and 6 years older than me As far as I was concerned they ran the world so I tried hard to keep up but at a certain point there are some places they don't want you along and all that. I had a hard time accepting that.
On the other hand they were always telling me about the things I "got away with" that they couldn't at my age. As far as I was concerned they got the best stuff, the most trust and went more places when young because they were my folks first kids and it was all new to all of them. I got the tired excuses that because my folks had done a bunch of things with my brothers they weren't interested in repeating it all for my sake. I got to see the great albums of snapshots later. Thanks a lot.
I got the hand me downs although I sometimes got 2 of things like those GODDAMNED DAVEY CROCKET COONSKIN CAPS!! Anybody here have one as a kid? I had 2 but lost them both through one of those sneak parent raids where they toss out a bunch of shit when you aren't around thinking that you won't notice. Ha!! They always manage to toss the great stuff (which was usually pop culture stuff that bugged them) that is worth a fortune now and hang onto the wrong stuff that is supposed to be good for you or something.

Don't get me started. I'm not really whining. I love my brothers and my parents although I sometimes wonder how I came to be in this particular family. I'm the only one really interested in cars and rodding and all that. I can look a long way about my family tree and see I'm practicly alone regarding that.

The old saying is "You can pick you friends and you can pick your nose but you can't pick your family. But sometimes you CAN pick your friends noses."

 

Same Thing Happened To Me Only It Was A 1982 Grand Prix My Dad Bought New It Only Had 20,000 Miles On It But The Tranney Was Bad So He Left It To Me When He Died Two Years Later My Brother Scraped It

 

That sucks.I've got an older sister who fucked over my dad for money years ago.She threatened him with all kinds of BS,and he finally cracked.She couldn't make it on 60K a year,so she sucked it out of mom and dad...and she was in her 40s..her shit hastened my dads death,and the last time we spoke was the call I made to tell her Mom was dead in '98.Not one word spoken since,not even at the funeral.Blood,my ass.
I've said for years I hope the bitch needs a kidney from me one day..
So I can tell her no,and watch her die.

 

You haven't beat him enough if this shit happened. I think beatings in NJ have a whole different meaning than in the rest of the country.

None of my brothers would ever entertain the thought of taking my shit, and I'm the youngest! Try having someone else do the beating. I think the brother thing is getting in the way of a proper pummeling. You probably roll around and yell like a couple of, well, brothers, when you fight.

Go hang out in front of the local bail bondsman's office and hire a real degenerate. Remember, most guys go to jail for drugs, theft, and beating their women. These are the perfect people for the task at hand. Hand some wife-beating crackhead $200 and your brother's address. Imagine how you'll look forward to Thanksgiving like never before. Imagine the joy of visting little brother in the hospital. "Nice shitbag, where's my fucking car?"

 

Why is that? I'd like to explain this to my dad. I'm the youngest, and my brothers got away with murder (literally), and I got blamed for everything.

One of many examples:
I clearly remember my older sister stealing moms car, getting drunk, driving head-on into a family, blinding the driver/mother, and bringing home the bent car pretending nothing happened. The next day I get a rash of shit because I didn't mow the lawn. Mow the lawn? Fucking devil-sister nearly killed someone last night, and I get shit for this? I was busy working my full-time job after school so the family could afford our mounting legal bills!

I only talk to 3 of my 6 siblings. If the other 3 were on fire, I would put them out with gasoline, and hammers, and broken glass, and my .38

 

I vote for an ass whopin. It will make you feel better, and maybe he will think twice about stealing from you in the future.

 

man you guys are RUTHLESS. you made me laugh though and i appreciate that.

i'm pretty certain he's not using any kind of drugs or anything like that. he's got a wife and 3 youngins. he's the second to youngest of 4. i'm the oldest. my youngest brother is the one most likely to be be using drugs (though he, thankfully, is finaly outgrowing that stage of his life) and the LEAST likely to fuck with my shit. my baby brother and i get along super good and we have many of the same interests. he has always shown more respect to me than he even showed my parents. the brother in question on the other hand has never shown any respect to me.

it's been a very long time since he has done anything like this but when we were all living at home he did that sort of thing quite often. usually just using (and often losing or breaking) my stuff without asking.
i used to have a collection of Pepsi cans when i was a teenager. they were all limited edition cans that they were coming out with at the time. i used my own money and bought up all the different cans and never opened them, intending to save them for many many years and eventualy sell them for a fortune (yeah right). well i kept them on a shelf in my closet till one day i came home to find they had all been drank and some of the cans returned for the deposit. like i would'nt notice! i can only assume it was him that did it since none of my brothers would fess up to it. would'nt surprise me if they all had a part in that one though.

for the longest time i've thought how lucky i was with my family. i hear people all the time bitching about this family member or that family member and i just thought to myself how lucky i was that everyone in my family got along so well now that we are all grown up. then this happens. it realy makes me sick and i'm starting to realize now that it is mostly because he could not see (or did not care) how much that stuff ment to me. it's like he did'nt know me at all. i'm realy starting to think that it is the blatent lack of respect for the things that mattered to me that is hurting more than the fact that my first hot rod is gone forever.


i've never been good at holding a grudge but i might be holding this one a while unless my brother can come up with a real compelling reason why i should'nt. such as a truely heart felt appology.
i'm even finding it hard to hold a grudge against my one asshole neighbor who has called the cops on me half a dozen times, cost me a bunch of money and just been a general pain in the ass... should i be advertising to the world what a sucker i am??? ...i know i can still hold a grudge if i feel it is warranted. is'nt that right Frank???

 

I think I'd file charge against him for stealing my car and property. and small cliams him for anything he owns. Being family he should have known better, but obviously didn't. 27 is way old enough to know better.

 

Do what I did when my brother sold my expedition for drug money when I was on my honeymoon in Fiji. Have his ass arrested. Blood is blood but some shit is unforgivable. 8 months in jail taught him a really hard lesson.

 

I'd say that for your mom's sake you need to let it go and just write your brother off. Sounds like kicking his ass will give you a quick bit of satisfaction, but will probably cause her more heartache than it's worth.

Some people just have no capacity for consideration of others. The way they approach everything is "if it benefits me, it's OK", and those people (whether they're family or not) should be avoided.

But I would go over to his house and take some of his stuff (right in front of him). If he has nothing of value, you can pretty much bet the farm that he's on drugs.

 

you are lucky. 3 out of 4 boys isn't bad. at least u didn't have to grow up with crazy amounts of emotional abuse, from say, a psycho older sister.

way i see it is that if something's really important to me, i don't leave it at home when i move out. when i moved outta the house, i took everything of value to me. if i left it, and they got rid of it, it's not my problem anymore.

what's really the issue isn't a lack of respect for property, it's a lack of respect, period. if it's not drugs then your brother is a completely self-centered boob. the bottom line is that when he went ahead and did all that shit, he wasn't thinking about you, he was thinking only about himself.

 

i think ving rhames said it best in pulp fiction:

"blow torch, pair of pliars and some pipe hitting n!$$ers..."

 

Merc told me about this post, I hadn't seen it untill now. That SUCKS man. My suggestion? You've got the title...your dad knos he did it....he's admitted it to you....the scrap yard would recognize him.....If you want to teach him a lesson he wont forget, turn him into the police for theft. He may just sit in a cell a few days, and if you feel that bad you can drop the charges. Otherwise demand at least whatever cash he got for the stuff.

 

at this point i don't think i'm going to do anything to further deapen the rift that he has started between us. he knows how pist i am and i KNOW my folks won't let him forget about it cause THEY know how pist i am too. i'm gonna take the high road. be the bigger man but i will not soon forget.

that said, i won't be trusting him again anytime soon or loaning him ANYTHING.
if i have anything left at mom and dad's it's coming home this weekend.

 

its amazing what a stolen hand gun an once of coke and a phone call can get done (hint hint)

 

Tell him he has a year to buy you another Impala, replace the gas pumps, and all the cash he got from their sale for pain and suffering.

Or else you can take it to court.

How can he even think of doing that? I got weird when I found a crashed/abandoned Kaiser in the woods, I wanted to take the badges off of it as keepsakes but couldn't bring myself to do it.

People just blow me away. Or maybe it's just their complete and total unuse of their grey matter that does. Either way, it's a sad situation.