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Folks Of Interest 34Larry must become only an observer once more.

Discussion in 'The Hokey Ass Message Board' started by 34Larry, Mar 12, 2024.

  1. 34Larry
    Joined: Apr 25, 2011
    Posts: 1,748

    34Larry
    Member

    And I lost my best fish'n partner of over 50 years to dementia August 7th, DAMN DEMENTA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
    Last edited: Mar 21, 2024
    mad mikey, Okie Pete, Stogy and 5 others like this.

  2. Larry, I admire you for what you are doing. Just take care of your self. You can't help her if you burn yourself out and down. I know!

    Ben
     
    Last edited: Mar 13, 2024
    mad mikey, Okie Pete, Stogy and 4 others like this.
  3. BamaMav
    Joined: Jun 19, 2011
    Posts: 6,969

    BamaMav
    Member
    from Berry, AL

    Hang in there man. We lost my wife’s mother a while back from the same thing plus complications from some other things. Her Dad was right there with her the whole time. Maybe some friends or family can give you a a little time every now and then to clear your head of things. Good luck, we’ll be here when you need to talk.
     
    mad mikey, Okie Pete, Stogy and 3 others like this.
  4. RodStRace
    Joined: Dec 7, 2007
    Posts: 5,560

    RodStRace
    Member

    Larry, as I was reading through your first post, I wondered how many here have been touched by the filthy finger of this horrid disease. Count me as another that has experience and wishes you the very best in dealing with it. I won't go into detail, offer platitudes or suggestions, except say that Mr48chev has it right. If this place is a small part of your life, hold on as needed to keep yourself 'in the world'. We'll be here for you.
     
  5. Sharpone
    Joined: Jul 25, 2022
    Posts: 1,463

    Sharpone
    Member

    My prayers and thoughts for you and your family, your wife is lucky to have such a man in her life as you, take care of you also. I gotta ask What’s a fishing engineer?
    Dan
     
    Okie Pete, Stogy, drdave and 3 others like this.
  6. TagMan
    Joined: Dec 12, 2002
    Posts: 6,312

    TagMan
    ALLIANCE MEMBER

    Special place in heaven for the caregivers.

    Prayers for your wife, you & your family.
     
  7. Dick Stevens
    Joined: Aug 7, 2012
    Posts: 3,850

    Dick Stevens
    Member

    As has been said many times already, but do take care of yourself too! Unfortunately way too amny of us have been touched by this horrid disease, I lost my 70 year old sister to it, my 89 year old brother is suffering with it along with other issues and I also have a cousin currently in a nursing facility with dementia. It is extremely difficult to watch people you love lose themselves to it.
     
    Okie Pete, Balljoint, Stogy and 2 others like this.
  8. modagger
    Joined: Jul 2, 2013
    Posts: 333

    modagger
    Member

    Larry
    Echoing what Cob said and remember that when all is said and done, don’t beat yourself up thinking, “maybe I should’ve”or “if only I was a little more understanding”.

    It took me years to move on from those thoughts.

    Be well
    Jeff
     
  9. Ebbsspeed
    Joined: Nov 11, 2005
    Posts: 6,353

    Ebbsspeed
    ALLIANCE MEMBER

    Keeping you in prayer Larry! We're going through this with my mom, physically fit as can be at 89 years old, but the memory is slowly going away. You pretty much lose them twice when this insidious disease strikes, once from memory loss and ultimately when the body fails.
     
  10. catdad49
    Joined: Sep 25, 2005
    Posts: 6,621

    catdad49
    Member

    Larry, My Thoughts and Prayers are with you both. Holler back at us when you can, Carp.
     
    Okie Pete, SS327, Stogy and 2 others like this.
  11. 34Larry
    Joined: Apr 25, 2011
    Posts: 1,748

    34Larry
    Member

    Wow oh Wow, just too many to thank for the wishes. :D:D THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!
    I find it a little difficult to post every day though. The last couple of days I have been ferrying her around Federal Way getting new eyeglasses as she dropped hers behind the car the trip before over the weekend and when leaving we backed over them of course. That turned out to be a different adventure also , but we got-her-done.:):)
    Tomorrow is a big day for her as is the Federal Way Women's Club monthly meeting and they welcome her still. Lori (her daughter takes her). There is a luncheon, a speaker, which sometimes is over her head, and she still remembers most of her close friends at this point, and she enjoys it immensely, and talks about it for days afterwards.
    And from the bottom of my heart guys, thanks once again.
     
    Sharpone, mad mikey, catdad49 and 5 others like this.
  12. 34Larry
    Joined: Apr 25, 2011
    Posts: 1,748

    34Larry
    Member

    Well Dan the engineer after measuring the length, girth, weight, and taking scales, and samples of the waste matter internally, & after appling the appropriate amount of air pressure in incrments of not more than a pound and a quarter at time up through the anis, then immediately releasing the fish to see if is alive or not. Then this data is then recorded, and reported via satellite to the proper fish and game federal data keeping data keepers in Washinton DC where all such B.S. is stored for use against us the common people when the time comes to use it in more regulation of us for just wanting to fish. This being a highly paid government position that can only be obtained, if you know someone that sits on or at the president's cabinet level, and pays quad drrillions, quarterly, with bonuses at every national holliday. I was let go because they said since you work at the level of the A- hole of the fish one must be able to be an A-hole and I would never be able to work myself to that level, so I was discharged.
    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    No......................No really it should read: Manfacturing Engineer, and then Fishing
     
    Last edited: Mar 19, 2024
    ffr1222k, mad mikey, catdad49 and 9 others like this.
  13. Blue One
    Joined: Feb 6, 2010
    Posts: 11,481

    Blue One
    ALLIANCE MEMBER
    from Alberta

    Hang in there Larry and get help where you can.
    My father cared for his wife as long as he could before he couldn’t manage any more.
    She had to be placed in care, dad was 83.
    She passed shortly afterwards and dad managed to get to 89 before he couldn’t manage anymore.
    Take whatever time you can for yourself and take whatever rest and joy you can get from life.
    It’s short enough as it is.
     
  14. Sharpone
    Joined: Jul 25, 2022
    Posts: 1,463

    Sharpone
    Member

    You’ll be OK with that sense of humor! Love it!
    Take care. If you ever need someone to bitch to or just talk ,Message me and I’ll give you my phone# I’m a good listener.
    Dan
     
  15. RodStRace
    Joined: Dec 7, 2007
    Posts: 5,560

    RodStRace
    Member

    One thing I've seen and heard is music from their youth is one happy point. In a world of confusion, that is a touchstone.
     
    X-cpe, mad mikey, catdad49 and 7 others like this.
  16. Mr48chev
    Joined: Dec 28, 2007
    Posts: 34,848

    Mr48chev
    ALLIANCE MEMBER

    Larry you and yours have been on my thoughts a bit lately because of my own situation.
    I had rotary cuff surgery exactly 6 weeks ago to fix that after having dislocating my shoulder and ripping my shoulder up on Dec 30 when I got tangled up in the vacuum cleaner cord that I hadn't put away right.
    The wife hadn't been feeling bad anyhow but I didn't realize it was a serious health issue and a shopping trip with my daughter quickly turned into 10 days in the hospital when my daughter figured out that things weren't right. She is still on the mend but can barely get around the house and the one armed guy has been doing the cooking, cleaning and what not that he should have taken over in the first place.
    I'd been going down and staying with my mom a couple of days a week to give my sister a break so she could run back to North Bend and have a couple of days of R&R but haven't been able to do that since new years.
    Now I am perfecting my left hand through the steering wheel shifting of a 4 speed truck skills though.
    Take care.
     
    X-cpe, mad mikey, 29A-V8 and 5 others like this.
  17. winduptoy
    Joined: Feb 19, 2013
    Posts: 3,626

    winduptoy
    ALLIANCE MEMBER

    Just lost my 95 yo mom....she had her good days and not so good ones....in the end, she had me stuck at about 10 years old.
    I agree that might be my level of maturity even though it took 72 years to get there
    Keep strong, know you are cared about and you are doing what you need to do......

    from an other Larry to a Larry.....
     
  18. My evil stepmother had dementia plus she was a classic sun-downer. Her and my dad were an hour's ride away when she took the ride to the ER on those bad nights. Luckily my dad lived to 96 with all of his marbles accounted for.

    My BIL has had early-onset dementia for about 20 years now. His wife keeps him VERY busy and they have the bucks to do so. My late wife was showing signs too, right before she came down with cancer.

    I worked with older guys 35 years ago, we just thought they were nasty old pricks. They would fight with anyone over nothing.
     
    Okie Pete and drdave like this.
  19. Chgo Sox Fan
    Joined: Apr 16, 2019
    Posts: 35

    Chgo Sox Fan

    Stay strong brother! Prayers for your wife.
     
    Okie Pete, Sharpone and drdave like this.
  20. Balljoint
    Joined: Dec 3, 2021
    Posts: 218

    Balljoint
    Member

    I’m glad that you and your wife had many good years together, no doubt she is appreciative of you being there for her, even if she can’t express it properly. I’ll be praying for you and your wife, not an easy road for either of you. Take care.
     
  21. 34Larry
    Joined: Apr 25, 2011
    Posts: 1,748

    34Larry
    Member

    Thursday @ 11:41 AM: "Mr48chev; I just caught your post. As you might imagine, (or not), I have become more of a Godly person in my senior years. Every day when arising from a night's sleep, "Just a closer walk with thee", is on my mind and is very prominent on my mind through the day. Why?, you and others might ask? I really do not know but it helps me tolerate whatever crops up during the day.
    Life as we all know can be hard and is at times very tough. It can seem at times, like for some unknown reason, karma has it "in" for us. What countless many others here have done for me on this thread, I will do for you. That is Pray for you, and for your life to return to normal. God bless you my friend and take care, life is shorter than most of us realize.
    34:)Larry.
     
  22. 34Larry
    Joined: Apr 25, 2011
    Posts: 1,748

    34Larry
    Member

    I just have to say a million thanks to Rayn and the moderators for allowing this thread to stay up and running. While it has little to do with the topic at hand, but a more personally "human stuff" I cannot let it go unnoticed that I deeply appreciate your tolerant acceptance. BTW, Jan still loves "Our '34 (3) Window, but the cammed, dual quad 331 Hemi scares her a bit at times and she still will NOT RIDE IN IT
     
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  23. phat rat
    Joined: Mar 18, 2001
    Posts: 4,972

    phat rat
    Member

    You're doing what any loving husband would do for his other half, BLESS YOU for that. My wife is a retired nurse, hospital and Hospice and knew of many spouses who split when things got really rough. One thing that has been mentioned but bares repeating. Take time for yourself, from what I gather this is a fairly new development. The longer it continues the more worn and stressed out you will become. My wife and I have gone through memory and health issues with both of our mothers and her father. It takes a real toll on you that you generally don't realize until the end. Check in when you can but it shouldn't be an obligation
     
  24. 34Larry
    Joined: Apr 25, 2011
    Posts: 1,748

    34Larry
    Member

    phat rat; Believe me there have been many moments.....o_O!:rolleyes:!:eek:!:confused:!:confused:!:confused:! but my Love for her check mate all. And somewhere along the marriage path I recall a vow to the Lord saying, "in sickness and in health", and I realize so well after having some strokes myself a few years back that the tables could be reversed so easy. This is my 2nd wife. We have been together 30 years, meeting at the greatest match maker in Seattle............Boeing. She has (3) has children, 1 daughter here, near us, a son in Chicago, and 1 daughter deceased a year or two ago. I also had (3) children. Two living near me and one also deceased.
    (It has been said, "no parent should ever have to bury a child"). And I will add ("no spouse should have to live and watch the dementia stricken loved spouse lose a once nimble all-knowing mind and just fade away.":mad::mad:) So I am keeping my vow so gladly, and in doing so I will have a few questions of the good Lord I would guess.
     
    Last edited: Mar 21, 2024
    twenty8, mad mikey, catdad49 and 4 others like this.
  25. duecesteve
    Joined: Nov 3, 2010
    Posts: 644

    duecesteve
    Member

    my wife works in the gym at a dementia facility and 55 & older residents and she says its not easy enjoy the good days and get a little me time. wishing you the best .stephen
     
  26. I took care of my wife when she was battling cancer. It was only a 9 month journey. It did bring us closer together and she overall had a good support system of family and friends.
     
  27. phat rat
    Joined: Mar 18, 2001
    Posts: 4,972

    phat rat
    Member

    We have some things in common. It's second marriage for my wife and I also, 35 yrs. She has a son in Chicago and I have a brother retired from Boeing and his daughter worked Boeing in Seattle then Charleston. Yes "In sickness and in health"
     
  28. Okie Pete
    Joined: Oct 29, 2008
    Posts: 5,465

    Okie Pete
    ALLIANCE MEMBER

    My Grandma had dementia. When She was having a bad day I’d play some Bob Wills and the Texas Playboys or other Western swing music. She would smile and tap her feet. I don’t know what was going on in her mind but the music would take her to a happy place. Prayers for You and Your Wife
     
    porkshop, mad mikey, catdad49 and 6 others like this.
  29. My BIL made up some music discs for my wife to listen to while in hospice. I'm still not sure she was able to hear them at that point. But if it helps, that is great,
     
    porkshop, Sharpone and Okie Pete like this.
  30. catdad49
    Joined: Sep 25, 2005
    Posts: 6,621

    catdad49
    Member

    Among other things, this is Tremendous Support Group! I've gone through all the posts and have been uplifted by all the sharing and caring provided by this bunch of Hot Rod Hoodlums. Thanks and Blessings to you All, Carp.
     

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