Ever had an automobile "expert" stop at your house/garage?

I had a gal that worked for me in my office Bookkeeping billing ECT She would come to me while I was under a dash or car & say we need to pay these bills Me The fool I just signed blank checks Then she diddnt show up for work one day The same day the bank called me!!!! Overdraft to the tune of over $5000 SHIT! her appartment was empty just like my CK book My accountant had A hard time figureing it out & @ $75 per hr I said I have already lost enough. Ps never give them white out

 

Great thread!

Some of you guys have alot more patience than I do. I can't even stand to talk idiots that think they know more about your car than you do.

 

Had a guy tell me when I asked him (my mistake) what he had in his IROC he said to 350s, making it a 700. Couldn't understand why he would not open the hood

 

A friend of mine's name is Jaurqui--pronounced" How-de-gee". We tell people you pronounce it "Smith"--all the letters are silent!

 

My last name is Gingles...pronounced "Jingles". You can imagine the shit I hear every day.

I also had a restorer know-it-all give me crap at a cruise night when I pulled my chopped, lowered, shaved, etc '48 Chevy pickup into the spot beside his perfectly restored version. Said I ruined the truck...blah, blah, blah. Then he said his was better because it got better milage than mine would. I finally told him that may be true, but lets both drive our trucks 1000 miles in one shot and see who got there first and was more relaxed. He finally shut up.

My current ride is a '27 Essex pickup, however Essex never made a pickup. It also has '30 Chevy fenders, rad shell, hood, bumpers, etc. I love sitting back and watching the experts try to figure it out. I'm waiting for someone's head to explode.

 

Sort of like Taliaferro County, Georgia, which the locals pronounce "Tolliver." Our word "bedlam" comes from a colloquial pronunciation of "Bethlehem," which was the name of an English mental institution.

As for the non-existence of '57 Chevy sedan deliveries, I pass by a really nice specimen of these mythical vehicles sitting under a carport near Cedartown GA every day going to and from work. There used to be a brand of coffee in this area by the name of Bailey's Supreme, and my grandfather Bailey would have no other brand of coffee in the house. Papa Bailey bought his Bailey's Supreme Coffee from a route salesman who drove a '57 Chevy sedan delivery.

 

Some time back, we came across a know-it-all mechanic helper. Unfortunately, he moved his mouth more than his hands. Anyhow, after hearing about his vast knowledge, my friend the garage owner sent him to fetch some parts and while he was there, pickup 8 spark plugs for the diesel he was working on.

The know-it-all called to say he was having a little trouble convincing the partshouse these spark plugs existed. The parts house workers must have had a field day with him.

This has been a very entertaining thread. Thanks for posting. I'm sure there are thousands of these stories.

 

Don't take this the wrong way but I'm impressed you know the origins of 'Bedlam' most people don't believe the truth about the word when told it!

Its kinda like the saying 'An eye for an eye', it comes from an ancient Babylonian law and does not literally mean 'An eye for an eye' but more accurately 'Let the punishment fit the crime'. The true wording is something like "If a man destroys the eye of another, they shall destroy his eye." or words to that effect.
Oh and it pre dates the friggin' usless book, the bible by century's!
Cheers,
Doc.

 

It's a Cruck.

 

I have been building my cars for years and there is always one in the shop and it never fails my one neighbor will wander over and tell me how he would do it if he were me. Well guess what, he aint me and so I just ignore him. He took a perfectly good Harley apart 20 years ago and its still in pieces. Thats his one claim to fame in building a custom anything.

 

That's how they (sedan deliveries) were able to get away with running the 4-speed Hydramatic--a truck transmission--back in the Junior Stock days.

Pete

 

One of my favorite "expert dumbass". I went to Checker Auto to get points, plugs, condenser, cap, rotor and wires for my 61 Chevy. Told the guy it was a 348. He says, "No, it's a 350". I said, "Nope, it's a 348". After a minute he realizes I'm not backing down. He calls the boss. Then HE tries to explain to me that Chevy made a 350. I said, "yes, I know that, but I don't have a small block, I have a big block 348, W head". He said, "Well, if you show me the engine I'll tell you what you really have.". So I did. Then he said, "what the hell is that?". I said, "A factory installed 1961 Chevy W head 348 cubic inch big block.". He went back in and looked it up and then the first doofus says, "I suppose you think you're some kind of expert now.". I said, "No, just more knowledgeable and with more common sense than you, obviously.". That was the third parts store that day that treated me the same way. Being a bit frustrated, I said in a rather loud voice, "Aren't here ANY parts stores in this town with people who know a f**king thing about older cars?". To which this old farmer who was standing in line answered, "Yeah, go see Gary at the Champion store about a half mile south, and by the way, even I know what a 348 is.". So, I did, and so did the old farmer. He pulled in the parking lot of Champion right behind me. I walked in, asked for the parts, and Gary went straight to the shelves and got the parts without looking up a single thing and said, "There ya go.". For many years, until Champion went out of business a few years ago that was the ONLY parts store I went to.

 

Thats nothing,I get people insisting on a daily basis that I spell my last name wrong. Every-other time I register a vehicle,the title comes back with my last name spelled wrong. And I distinctly remember every singletime clearly printing it out so that there is no mistake,and correcting the person behind the counter also. All I get is,"Are you sure that`s right??"

No,I don`t know how to spell my own name!!!

 

Man, thats worse than someone eating your Hamb n' eggs on you!!!!!

 

Funny, I get the same crap about people misspelling my first name or telling me that I'm spelling it wrong. It's "Denis", with one "N". A long time ago I figured out how to get people to remember the right spelling. I just tell them that it's pronounced "Dennis", but spelled just like "Penis", but with a "D". After that explanation, I've yet to meet anyone who's forgotten how to spell it.

Don't know why my mother chose to spell it that way. Then again, my brother's name is "Dick".....

 

I had a work associate about 10 years ago that WAS the guy in the restaurant. He was pretty loud and definitely obnoxious, but pretty funny. He was sitting with his wife in a little diner in Eastern Washington when a genuine GTO Judge pulls into the lot and backs up to the building, right outside the window from this guy. Out gets two old "Blue Hairs" (as he descibed them). So he's going on and on to his wife about goats, about the different models, etc. Then he says (loudly) 'I ought to make a low-ball offer on that car. You don't suppose those old ladies have any idea what they have there, do you?.' Much to his embarrassment, she had been seated in the booth right behind him and he didn't know it. She leaned around the corner, gives him the eye, and said 'Of course I do, sonny. It's a Judge and it's all mine. You have a nice day now.' Pretty funny.

He was embarrassed, but at least had enough of a sense of humor to realize he was an @$$ and laugh at himself.

 

Darned funny!!

 

this reminds me of the chevy guy at autozone..why not just drop a chevy in your buick hes say...why a nailhead? he goes on on and on how chevy engine parts are cheaper and this and that,while they might be im still a buick nut..yea! but chevys are much better..better! buick never used a chevy motor in there cars but chevy did use the ole so kool 322. wers quagmire when you need him