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Discussion in 'The Hokey Ass Message Board' started by OoltewahSpeedShop, Aug 8, 2009.

  1. Ozzie
    Joined: Sep 1, 2006
    Posts: 458

    Ozzie
    Member

    ''My mom is an emerg. nurse, I keep telling her, just give the jerks an enema!

    Guy's being an ass, give him an enema!

    Being violent? Enema AND a straightjacket!""


    That's a good one. My 1st wife was an emergency room paramedic at a busy Miami hospital, when someone was being too unrully or came in all druged up and also being unrully, she'd order a catheter...a bit larger than what was right.. MAN she hated mean people.. Think about it guys.. a catheter one size too large!,,, My spine spasms just thinking about it.!
     
  2. 32SEDAN
    Joined: Jul 30, 2008
    Posts: 1,314

    32SEDAN
    Member

    That's a good one. My 1st wife was an emergency room paramedic at a busy Miami hospital, when someone was being too unrully or came in all druged up and also being unrully, she'd order a catheter...a bit larger than what was right.. MAN she hated mean people.. Think about it guys.. a catheter one size too large!,,, My spine spasms just thinking about it.![/QUOTE]

    -- Hence the divorce!!! Ouch man!
     
  3. Ozzie
    Joined: Sep 1, 2006
    Posts: 458

    Ozzie
    Member

    Hahahaha!!, Nope the divorce was cause she decided to bed a fellow worker in the emergency room, and ended up getting pregnant, Judge listened to her lawyer ask for all kinds of payments and items from our place, Her lawyer even tried to say that I was the father without me being the Biological father. The Judge listened to it all and then said. " AHHHH who are you trying to kid counselor" I walked out 100% free not another penny spent!.

    Back to the subject at hand. Tailgaters suck!, and that scene from Lost Highway posted earlier was classic! My buddy Dan Kneece was the steadicam operator on that film.
     
  4. Diavolo
    Joined: Apr 1, 2009
    Posts: 824

    Diavolo
    Member

    I don't know if this is just a local thing, but here in New Mexico we have what is called a rolling road block. 3 lanes of traffic, driving 5 miles below the speed limit, all 3 cars riding door to door, not letting anyone get by. I almost exclusively ride my motorcycle now during the daylight hours if I can get away with it. That is the only way I can get around the road block and get to where I need to be at a decent time. Almost without fail, there is at least 2 of the 3 cars with someone either on the phone, texting, or eating.

    When they can't stay in their lane, I usually knock on their door window with my titanium plated glove... hard enough for them to hear it. It usually gets them to hang up the phone and see me riding close enough to hang the phone up for them. Then I adjust their mirror with my finger and drive off :) (no I don't break anything, just reach over and push the mirror out of alignment a few degrees is all)

    I don't look for them, and I usually drive the speed limit. It's just when they are getting in my lane, why not remind them there are other people around? I've learned many years ago to not take it personally, they're just morons.
     
  5. alex1954chevy
    Joined: Apr 13, 2008
    Posts: 256

    alex1954chevy
    Member

    when people try and get to close to me i usally hit the toggle switch under my dash, that backs them off REAL QUICK HAHAHAHA
     

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  6. lamy_chop
    Joined: Aug 3, 2009
    Posts: 131

    lamy_chop
    BANNED

    as a full time motorcyclist, i generally stay in the left lane for my own safety. i usually go faster than most, but i do my best not to get too close even though i can stop with no problem.
    it does REALLY piss me off when assholes want to tailgate me when i'm on my bike thinking they can stop in time if i have to make an emergency stop. i usually hit the rear brake enough to turn on the brake light. when they back off i just shake my head hard enough they can see.
    so many things to complain about with shitty drivers i just don't have the time to disseminate it all.
    with all of the complaining of other drivers though, if you ride a bike daily you realize how bad of a driver you really are yourself.
     
  7. lamy_chop
    Joined: Aug 3, 2009
    Posts: 131

    lamy_chop
    BANNED

    thats bullshit! slow idiots can be cited with "impeding the flow of traffic", i've seen it happen many times.
     
  8. Salty
    Joined: Jul 24, 2006
    Posts: 2,258

    Salty
    Member
    from Florida


    I've done it many times....:D As I said, that one strikes a chord with me...
     
  9. lamy_chop
    Joined: Aug 3, 2009
    Posts: 131

    lamy_chop
    BANNED

    try driving in new orleans. everyone, and i mean everyone cops included, are terrified of parked cars. i've been run off the road on my bike by assholes crossing the center line to avoid the empty parked car on the road with 12' lanes and 9' on road parking even when the cars are parked half off the road.
     
  10. PunkAssGearhead88
    Joined: Jul 9, 2006
    Posts: 1,791

    PunkAssGearhead88
    Member
    from So Cal

    Awwww, I love seeing threads like this! Its always good to know that im not the only one who gets f*cked with on the road because im not in another sheepmobile. I started a thread similar to this a while back..
    http://www.jalopyjournal.com/forum/showthread.php?t=304683&highlight=do+you+notice+difference

    Whats funny is the false sense of security people feel in their climate controlled cages. They wouldnt dare rub shoulders with you at the supermarket without saying excuse me, but they dont hesitate going around you cutting you off within inches of your car without using their blinkers just to prove that your going too slow for them or whatever the reason is in thier stupid mind. If its not ok to be rude in person, then why is it ok to be rude in your cage on wheels?

    I have drove MANY different types of vehicles, and I do not agree with anyone who says it does not matter what you drive IT ABSOULUTELY DOES!! People are soo judgemental! If they dont think you can catch up to them or do anything they wont hesitate to disrespect you! But when catch up to their cage on wheels at about 90 MPH or at the next red light and get out of your custom / hot rod etc, they dont know what to think and AVOID confortation at all costs! F*cking pussies!
    If I had to pick, I would say people in leased trendy Euro cages and the typical cocky asshole in his late model pick-up truck especially diesels are the worst!
    I wish all these assholes end up with thier brians, eyes, teeth and intesetines all over the road in a gory crash so bad it would take a trash bag and a shovel to scoop up thier worthless carcass off the roadway, just like those old Red Asphalt and Hell's Highways films. God, I hate a lot of people...
     
    Last edited: Aug 11, 2009
  11. lamy_chop
    Joined: Aug 3, 2009
    Posts: 131

    lamy_chop
    BANNED

    it's the SUV fuckwads i hate the most. they act like they have some special entitlement that the rest of us don't. talking on their fucking cell phones and fucking with the radio, at the same time they're doing their fucking make up (male and female on that one), while shooting the shit with the other 6 people in the car, on their way to the club, so they can drink the night away and drive home drunk, doing the same shit they did on the way to the shitty club.
    yes, i'm a bit misanthropic, ain't i?
     
  12. poboyross
    Joined: Apr 29, 2009
    Posts: 2,142

    poboyross
    Member
    from West TN

    This crap happens to me ALL the fuggin time here in NJ. Sorry those of you who are from here...but Northeast Jersey is douche capital of America. When I had a larger car, I would enforce my road rights by law upon this treachery. However, now I just have to deal with it, and flip them off. I'm waiting for someone to follow me to my destination, so I can rearrange their face.....I've got 4 years of inflicted douchebaggery to unload on someone.
     
  13. RichG
    Joined: Dec 8, 2008
    Posts: 3,919

    RichG
    Member

    Dude, you can scare the shit outta me with a catheter that's the right size! I hope I never have to have another!:eek:
     
  14. madpiper
    Joined: May 7, 2009
    Posts: 41

    madpiper
    Member

    as my stepfather once told me ....no matter how fast your going someone else wants to go faster...stay your speed and soon they will all be in front of you.
     

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