Deal With It...

Kevin Lee · Apr 1, 2004

Why don't all of you big strapping men take this retro***ual **** somewhere else? I'm starting to feel like it's being pushed on me. Five pages is enough for ****'s sake.

Hot Rod To Hell · Apr 1, 2004

Hey Grimlok. You should be like me.

Ok. Lets just agree that he has the RIGHT to have a baby, even if he can't actually have a baby....

gettingreasy · Apr 1, 2004

I'll **** a sheep if I damn well please! Thats my god given right(or is it Ahla now?), ain't nothing more purdy than a feild fulla sheep and me wearin my mud boots!
-Jesse

James Maxwell · Mar 23, 2010

CharlieLed said: ↑

OK folks, I have had it. I've taken all I can stand and I can't stand no more. Every time my TV is on, all that can be seen is effeminate men redecorating houses and talking about foreign concepts like "style". Real men of the world, stand up, scratch your ****s, belch, and yell "ENOUGH!" I hereby announce the start of a new offensive in the culture wars, the Retro***ual movement.

The Code.......
A Retro***ual, no matter what the women insists, PAYS FOR THE DAMN DATE. A Retro***ual opens doors for a lady. Even for the ones that fit that term only because they are female. A Retro***ual DEALS with ****. Be it a flat tire, break-in into your home, or a natural disaster, you DEAL WITH IT. A Retro***ual not only eats red meat, he often kills it himself. A Retro***ual doesn't worry about living to be 90. It's not how long you live, but how well. If you're 90 years old and still smoking cigars and drinking, I salute you. A Retro***ual does not use more hair or skin products than a woman. Women have several supermarket aisles of stuff. Retro***uals need an end cap (possibly 2 end caps if you include shaving goods.) A Retro***ual does not dress in clothes from Hot Topic when he's 30 years old. A Retro***ual watches no TV show with "Queer" in the ***le. A Retro***ual should not give up excessive amounts of manliness for women. Some changes are inevitable, but major re-invention of yourself will only lead to you becoming a foo-foo little puss, and in the long run, she ain't worth it. A Retro***ual is allowed to seek professional help for major mental stress such as drug/alcohol addiction, death of your entire family in a freak tree chipper accident, favorite sports team being moved to a different city etc. You are NOT allowed to see a shrink because Daddy didn't pay you enough attention. Daddy was busy DEALING WITH IT. When you screwed up, he DEALT with you. A Retro***ual knows how to tie a Windsor knot when wearing a tie. A Retro***ual should have at least one good wound he can brag about getting. A Retro***ual knows how to use a basic set of tools. If you can't hammer a nail, or drill a straight hole, practice in secret until you can or be rightfully ridiculed for the wuss you be. A Retro***ual gives a lady his seat on the bus/subway/etc. A Retro***ual knows that owning a gun is not a sign that your are riddled with fear, guns are TOOLS and are often essential to DEAL WITH IT. Plus it's just damned fun to shoot. Crying........... There are very few reason that a retro***ual may cry, and none of them have to do with TV commercials, movies, or soap operas. Sports teams are sometimes a reason to cry, but the preferred method of release is swearing or throwing the remote control. Some reasons a retro***ual can cry include (but are not limited to) death of a loved one, death of a pet ( fish do NOT count as pets in this case), loss of a major body part. A retro***ual man's favorite movie isn't "Maid in Manhattan" (unless that refers to some foxy french maid sitting in a huge tub of brandy or whiskey), or "Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood". Acceptable ones may include any of the Dirty Harry or Nameless drifter movies (Clint in his better days), Rambo I or II, the Dirty Dozen, The Godfather trilogy, Scarface, The Road Warrior, The Die Hard series, Tobacco Road, Rocky I, II, or III, Full Metal Jacket, any James Bond Movie, Raging Bull, Bullitt, any Bruce Lee movie, Apocalypse Now, Goodfellas, Reservoir Dogs, or Fight Club. When a retro***ual is on a crowded bus and or a commuter train, and a pregnant woman, hell, any woman gets on, that retro***ual stands up and offers his seat to that woman, then looks around at the other so called men still in their seats with a disgusted "you punks" look on his face. A retro***ual knows how to say the Pledge properly, and with the correct emphasis and pronunciation. He also knows the words to the Star Spangled Banner. A retro***ual will have hobbies and habits his wife and mother do not understand, but that are essential to his manliness, in that they offset the acceptable manliness decline he suffers when married/engaged in a serious healthy relationship. I.E. hunting, boxing, shot putting, shooting, car maintenance. A retro***ual knows how to sharpen his own knives and kitchen utensils. A Retro***ual man can drive in snow (hell, a blizzard) without sliding all over or driving under 20mph. A retro***ual man can chop down a tree and make it land where he wants. Where ever it lands is where he wanted it to land. A retro***ual will give up his seat on a bus to not only any women but any elderly person or person in military dress (except officers above 2nd LT.)
NOTE: The person in military dress may turn down the offer but the retro***ual man will ALWAYS make the offer to them and thank them for serving their country. A retro***ual man doesn't need a contract, a handshake is good enough. He will always stand by his word even if cir***stances change or the other person deceived him. A retro***ual man doesn't immediately look to sue someone when he does something stupid and hurts himself. We understand that sometimes in the process doing things we get hurt and we just DEAL WITH IT. With guns, we are citizens. Without them, we are subjects. "Life is hard if you are stupid...." Anonymous
Click to expand...

Hey, it's a car website! I did a little thinking about this, and after reading the thread, I do have to point out one thing: "HAMB" is a lifestyle! Deal with that. Have met fellow HAMBers, good peeps.

metalshapes · Mar 23, 2010

James Maxwell said: ↑

Hey, it's a car website!
Click to expand...

Yes it is...

So you didnt need to bring this Thread back up after 6 years to tell him that.

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Deal With It...

Kevin Lee
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from KC,MO - The cradle of hot rodding
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Hot Rod To Hell
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from Flint MI

gettingreasy
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from Portland Ore.

James Maxwell
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from So-Cal

metalshapes
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from Tucson, AZ USA

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Deal With It...

Kevin Lee Super Moderator from KC,MO - The cradle of hot rodding Staff Member

Hot Rod To Hell Member from Flint MI

gettingreasy Member from Portland Ore.

James Maxwell Member from So-Cal

metalshapes Member from Tucson, AZ USA

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Kevin Lee
Super Moderator

from KC,MO - The cradle of hot rodding
Staff Member

Hot Rod To Hell
Member

from Flint MI

gettingreasy
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from Portland Ore.

James Maxwell
Member

from So-Cal

metalshapes
Member

from Tucson, AZ USA