some may know I teach Junior High kids. Unfortunately I have lost a few over the years, it is always a horribly confusing emotion. This Saturday a fine young man I had in cl*** last year took his life, I am struggling. He and his friends enjoyed building some very outrageous chopper bicycles, I tried to explain the finer points of rake and trail to them but it was like a monkey trying to do math problem , oh well, they were having fun, the "technical" details would fall into place later. He was really into racing his dirt bike and was currently restoring his '70 chevy pickup. Please hug your children tonight and let them know that no matter what, no matter what "mistakes" they may make, that you love them... thanks for letting me vent alittle.
that's very sad. that age of kids seems to make possible very bad combinations of hormones, stress, confusion that leads to suicides....
Sorry to hear this. When I was in high school I lost a cl***mate every year - all 4 years. Spooky thing was that it was always between the middle of December and the New Year. My condolences.
Neighbor down the street, 16 year old boy name Matthew, hung himself on New years, it was his second attempt. He had a rough life, adopted at 5 by a single mother after being a street kid in Lima, Peru. He had trouble with the law (creative mischief and petty theft), his girlfriend dumping him was the last straw. I couldn't go to the memorial yesterday, too many this year, too painful. I heard that at the school he goes to, there are so many "R.I.P. and "in memory of" posters that they are mostly ignored, they are numb to it.
What kind of idiot offs himself? Maybe that sounds callous...and Dan, I'm sorry for your loss. Its a HORRIBLE thing...but I think people should know that killing ones self is NOT something that should be an option. My brother had a really good friend that shot himself. I was friends with him too, but he was really close to my little brother. I can't understand it. I sure as hell don't respect it....and it makes me ANGRY. No matter how bad life gets, suicide is stupid. DAMN STUPID
Sorry to hear that. You know you can always vent on here. Sympathies to you, his friends, and family.
Von Tingler...I understand what you are trying to say. Children are not always cognitively able to understand that death is forever, you dont come back. Sometimes they think, "I'll show 'em, I'll kill myself and then they'll be sorry, boy my friends and I will laugh about this tomorrow!" They sometimes really dont understand the horrible consequences of some decisions.
VT who knows what goes through peoples minds that make them decide to take their own life? Maybe that seems to them to be the only way to deal with something. An irreversible decision if successful, and one with a lot of repercussions if not... either way it really affects the people you leave behind. I've lost friends and family members to suicide... it ****s. Makes me both sad and angry. Dan, I'm very sorry to hear about the loss of a student... seems like in situations like this words fail me.
We have lost a few close friends over the years because sane people loose grip on reality also! Suicide is a long term answer to a short term problem. Remember,,the sun will shine again,,,,maybe not tomorrow,,but it will come back out! HRP Dan,sorry for your loss.
Dan - sorry to hear that, he obviously made an impression on ya. [ QUOTE ] I heard that at the school he goes to, there are so many "R.I.P. and "in memory of" posters that they are mostly ignored, they are numb to it. [/ QUOTE ] WTF? That is so sad, very sad Don't want to think the world will be like in another 50 years.
When I was in 8th grade, a 6th grader at my school hung himself. I guess he had mentioned to some of his teachers that his stepdad had been beating him up...and no one helped him. I still think about that poor little kid to this day. I'm sorry to hear about your loss...what a terrible, terrible thing to happen.
Possibly Bipolar or Unipolar, too. I'm Bipolar myself and know firsthand how your brain can turn against yourself. There's no need to have a callous at***ude toward those who take permanent and decisive action against their intense emotional pain and the battle that they cannot win, under the guise of saying that "suicide is stupid". Suicide is not a good solution, but when someone says "suicide is stupid" they seem to me to really be thinking inside "that guy is stupid for committing suicide". Don't be one of those (and I hope this isn't what you were actually thinking to yourself, but only you know). Instead, call it for what it is-- a bad solution. Then have comp***ion for those who are still having trouble.
Its sad becuase it is so preventable, I feel all kids need at least one person they know will always stick up for them, I try to be that person as often as i can, anyway Dan all i can say is to rember the good things.
Suicide is a horrible loss to all! I know this first hand as my first wife commited suicide ten yrs ago. It is a sad loss, but depression is usually the cause and it is very hard to understand how it affect someone unless you see it first hand. I still have a hard time understanding it as I have never been that depressed, There are signs to watch for but hard to catch unless you know what to look for, If it is caught it is only hoped that the right combination of drugs and councelling can get it under controll. Don't kick yourself for not seeing the signs, Most depression is due to a chemical imbalance and if the right balance is achieved it is amazing the difference, I have seen this also as my current wife is also bipolar and has achieved this balance. Sorry for rambling I don't talk about this much, but life goes on, Dana
Sorry about your loss.Lost a friend to stupidcide,just wish he'd thought of who he'd hurt besides the his girlfriend!
[ QUOTE ] I can't understand it. I sure as hell don't respect it....and it makes me ANGRY. No matter how bad life gets, suicide is stupid. [/ QUOTE ] i agree with ya
Dan, Terribly sorry for you, your students, and the family and friends. Maybe there is something you can do to make something positive come of this. Maybe your students can do a tribute project to increase awareness and get people talking to each other and about the issue. Sounds like a cool kid and I bet his friends and you are all looking for some kind of outlet right now. This might be just the ticket.
VT, you are being callous. I'm sorry to hear about your loss Dan, you sound like the kind of teacher who I would've loved to have had. I'm a parent of a teenager, the pressures they have on them are unbelievable. Teenage suicide is an epidemic in this country. I have no answers, just questions.
Suicide is a very touchy subject with me, I have lived with it my whole life. I have had very close friends take their own life, and my own mother trying to end her own existance while I was growing up. I lost my cousin just before Tanksgiving he hung himself in his garage just before his mother came home. My own mother has atempted but has never succeded. I don't know what hurts more, losing some one or loving someone that does not care to live. Jonney
I have to agree with unclescooby on this one - excellent plan. Will be sending some extra light your way, Dan - I can relate to your loss, AND to the kid: I tried to off myself once, but luckily, it was during a period in my life when I did everything half-***ed! Grateful to be here today, and I second unclescoobys idea - good things could come from this - it doesn't have to be all bad...
Last yr one of the local High schools took a section of thier campus and built a park where the kids can go and remember any of thier cl***mates that lost thier lives during school whether frim suicide or accidentaly after having about 3 or 4 suicides in 2 yrs. Dana
Dan, I feel for you bro. I can understand your plight. However I am sure I will piss off many with my opinions. Suicide is for chicken ****s. Plain and simple. Done deal. No matter how bad anyone thinks it is, it could always be worse. Everyone goes through the growing years and can become easily confused, frustrated, and feel alone and unwanted. It happened to me 18 years ago. Thought about offing myself but suddenlyrealized that the only person that dictates my life is me. Those that threaten to take their own life, or do take their own life, are pretty much just mindless fodder in my book. Not to be a **** but suicide is for gutless pukes with no balls. I still feel for you. You all can hate me now or later...it's irrelevant to me.
Missing Link, you seem to be aware of what was going on inside of yourself, and the level of depression you had as a personal experience. But you DO NOT know what others are dealing with inside. When I finally sought out treatment, I can tell you that what was going on in my brain was like a nightmare movie. It was unreal. Many people that commit suicide due to the natural need to escape the severe effects caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain are NOT "chicken ****" as you seem to think out of ignorance. Your personal experience cannot relate.
I don't want to turn Dan's post asking for support into a debate on whether or not suicide is checken ****. I do agree with Blownolds here. I am the last survivor of the seven kids in my two block neighborhood. I'm 33. It's been two years since the last one died. My best friend Greg would never hurt anyone but he hit a semi head on at over 90MPH and very clearly on purpose. My dear friend John was the toughest guy I've ever known and he poisoned himself and took 7 hours to die a grizzly death. Neither were chicken ****s. One was schizophrenic and the other was bipolar and neither were on the right medication. We don't know what is going on in the minds of these people or if they were even capable of knowing that themselves. The point here is that Dan experienced a lost and he would like a little suppport from his brothers and sisters on this message board. He fully deserves it. Clearly Dan, you have our support and prayers and so does this boy and all who know him. I'd really like to see this post turn into something constructive for people who need it. I like the ideas about a tribute project or something that can help these folks to heal and release the pain. Sympathy is a great thing and a plan to make good could not only help here but it could save lives at that school or other places that HAMBERs and friends want to make a difference. I'd like to see these kids grow up to be happy hotrodders and I'd like Dan to know that we are all here to help. I'd gladly donate parts or money if you need them to get something underway. Thanks guys.
[ QUOTE ] Dan, Terribly sorry for you, your students, and the family and friends. Maybe there is something you can do to make something positive come of this. Maybe your students can do a tribute project to increase awareness and get people talking to each other and about the issue. Sounds like a cool kid and I bet his friends and you are all looking for some kind of outlet right now. This might be just the ticket. [/ QUOTE ] I agree Scooby, Make something pos. out of this !! My prayers are with you and his family !!
I was being a little callous. But I stand behind what I say. I don't think there is any arguement here or anything. I think we ALL HATE the thought of somebody committing suicide. Its such a tragic thing. I would hope that if anyone is reading this and thinking about possibly ending it all....DON'T do it. You can send me a PM and I'll give you my phone # and we can talk all night. I'll help you to not do it. SERIOUSLY. There are SO many other infinitely more creative and powerful ways to deal with a problem. As a matter of fact, once you are dead...you can no longer deal with a problem. ANY PROBLEM. I heard a wonderful speach one time on the topic of the Columbine killings (which also involved suicide). The speaker made the point that he was greatly saddened by the Columbine killings.....Greatly saddened, not only because it was a horrible tragedy, but mostly because it was such an uncreative way to "deal" with a problem. He meant that those boys could have put all that energy into doing something a hell of a lot more FUN to achieve the same goal....(the goal of making their "enemies" pay). Its just sad is all. I'm sorry for anyone who feels they have it so tough.
Like unclescooby, I grew up in a neighborhood in which lots of kids killed themselves. Personally, I think it had something to do with large amounts of chem plants in the area-certain pollutants act as depressants. Working with abused kids, I met 5 year olds that had tried to kill themselves-I wouldn't call them '***********'. They were very aware of what they were doing when they tried to end their lives- they were trying to end their pain. I always said that one day I'd send a letter to one of these Right to Life groups asking why they weren't giving foster homes money for taking care of all these kids nobody wants, but thank God they were born, you know...
The Jalopy Journal
