Any help needed from the ladies (or anyone) please...

No, No, Women taste great when battered! P.S. That was one of the asides ever!

 

oh. my. god.
....

......

This is just too funny!!!!! HAHAHAHA

 

She allows me to act tuff because I worship the ground she walks on, and paid for her to open her own buisness. Please don't tell the guys on here that I'm whipped.....

I would never hit her. I might punt one of my daughters across the living room like a football, but I'd never hit my old lady

 

My wife & I were 17 years old when we began dating and on one of out first dates, I went to her parent's house to pick her up. I pulled in her driveway and the exhaust pipe in my '56 Chevy blew a hole. She went in the house and got some tin snips, baling wire and a #10 can and crawled under the car and held the can in place while I wired it up and then we went out.

We got married a year later and that was 45 years ago. I couldn't imagine having a better friend that she is.

Moral: If she'll work in the shop with you and drive in a crappy old truck or car with a smile on her face, marry her!

 

You have to know women, here is a small bit:
Women have a hard time seeing black objects at night- thus all the black cars.
Women have a hard time telling what a lumpy thing might be under covers- car covers.
Women can't see anything around really shiny objects- most guys propose with the ring directly in front of their face.
Women are drawn to things that look infant or childs face like- explains all VW products.
Woman generally despise any item that makes noise over 50 db.
Women dislike the smell of fuels and paints, spray some around the shop to keep her out.
Women hate to see men enjoy themselves- always swear and bitch and rant at your car when she is around.
Women want to be the center of attention- never ever talk about your car in her presence.
Do your own car laundry, never use your joint credit card, don't wash your hands in the kitchen sink, don't piss in her flowers next to the garage cause your'e too lazy to piss in the house, wear shoe booties in the house so you don't track oil in her house, take a shower after you work on your car so she don't smell the other woman, don't use her peach bath towels that she got at a tupperware party to dry off your car, don't use all her lemony dish soap to wash your car, get your own scissors!
I'll think of more or they will happen to me shortly. Good luck!

 

well hey, there's nothing wrong with worshipping your goddess, the greeks did it all the time! =) and don't worry, i won't tell anyone. the secret is safe with me.
as for the punting of the daughters? i don't suggest doing it in the house, take 'em outside, you can get more distance, won't break the lamps, AND it's easier cleanup if they bleed!!! HAHAHA
(i tell my child at least once a day that "this is why lions eat their young")

 

my ex-wife used to get on me about projects.... good thing I cant hear her mouth from my new house.

I told my current that I have tons of projects, and if she bitches... I'll move on again.

She buys what she wants, so do I, as long as it doesn't interfere with the quality of life... neither of us say a word to the other about our spending habits.... 2 way street

An addiction to cars... way better than bars

 

Our first real date was on a Norton Atlas. We (me?) were pretty toasted and got stopped at the only stop light in our town. She was leaning over talking to me in my ear when the light turned green.

As I was closing on the other side of the intersection I said to myself Man I must be really loaded sounds like she is way back there. So I looked over my shoulder and there she stood in the crosswalk so I spun around and she jumped on the back and pinched me.

A week later we pooled our funds and purchased a '58 Merc. We have been buddies ever since.

Here's one for ya. I was talking to Mrs. Beaner on the phone over lunch. She asked if I was making any headway on the job search and my Willys driver. I said a little and told her about this post.

She chuckled and said I should tell everyone that the only time she gets any rest is when I'm working on a car or going after one.

I really don't think that's fair.

 

I love stories like that. I guess I really do have emotions, somewhere. haha

And Mrs. Beaner... My lady, I give YOU two thumbs up!

 

she's home now, so I guess I'll review the posts and see which one works. If I haven't posted back on here in 2 days...send the troops. I hope that I don't have to call a Broken Arrow

 

U got this one, NV99. Just don't forget the shelter for battered women option!