I almost got bitten by a junk yard dog yesterday.

Bear with me this is a funny story.
I had to go get some gutters for work and as I'm wont to do I keep my eyes peeled for junk all the time.
Darglinks will testify that Old Winter Garden Rd in Orlando still has a bunch of old cars lurking in various corners.
Anyway I spy the outline of an old Buick in one junk filled shop so I stop.
I ask the elderly black gentleman if it's for sale, he says, "Sho', everythin's fer sale fer the right price."
I ask him if it's OK for me to go look at it, he says "Go right ahead."
So I'm looking at this rusty heap of a '46 Buick sedan and thinking it would take a brave man to entertain thoughts of fixing it.
I started to leave and here comes the owner screaming, "Oh Lordy, Lordy, I done forgot to tell you about the dawg, get out of there fast."
Just as he said that, this huge dog on a chain comes running after me, bellowing and huffing. He was sleeping right behind the Buick and I never saw him.
Then the owner tells, "Shoot I shoulda told you about him, I'm sure glad you wuz' wearin' quiet shoes or else he'd a bit yer ankles clean off."

I had a good laugh about it with the ol' timer.

 

I once drove into a junkyard in Holland and found no one in sight. I was hoping to prove my belief that the smaller Europen countries still had lots of old American iron that they had carefully hidden from wehrmacht requisition.
I was greeted by an extremely large shepherd/werewolf mix doggy, and decided to exhibit the superiority of primate brain and technology by simply driving the car along his chain until he had about 6" of slack left. Upon opening my door, I discovered I had missed the chain's path by about .006", and that the dog fully apprehended the import of my actions and vehemently disapproved. Seconds after my world record leap/doorslam, I got to meet the only damn person in Holland who spoke no English at all. Not a good day's hunt...

 

Gee looks like your working hard again at not woring.....I wish that dogg had bit you in the burnt balls

 

Mike, I've been doing nuthin' but working all fraggin' week, I'm sick and tired of it.
So what I took 10 minutes to scope out the treasures on OWGR?
You ain't the boss of me, I'm the boss of me.
No wait, my dad's the boss of me.

 

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HankCash..........hahahahaah the OG Junkyard Dogg.
Nads long lost Daddy!!!!!!

 

Nads, I love old junk yards and the old boys who run'em! Unfortunatley they are disappearing fast.I use to drive in Demo Derbies under the name Crash Gordon. I went to a local yard where I had picked up cars before. You could get one then for about $50, and asked what he had. I always liked 59 Fords but he didn't have one and said he could get a Caddy if I was willing to pay $75. I said OK and he sent his son to go fetch the Caddy. About ten minutes later he comes back with a big old burgandy Sedan de'Ville. As I'm loading it up he says, "Guess I'm gonna have to find my daughter something else to drive". He sold me his kids Caddy to demo!

 

Years ago buddy of mine and I wandered into a junk yard looking for a starter. While my friend is talking with the 140-year-old owner I decided to have a bit of a poke around so I start wandering. I hear the old guy yell something along the lines of, "Hey asshole, you stupid or something?!!", so I turn and say "what?! you got a dog?", he say's "I don't need no fuckin' dawg. That's what the bear traps are for"... I looked down and almost filled my dumb-ass city boy pants.

 

Bruce, "sheperd/werewolf mix doggy"...HAHAHA! That conjured up quite a visual!

 

You shoulda seen the visual with his face squashed against the window glass two inches away...
If he'd taken a better running start he would have exited the OTHER window with my head in his mouth...

 

The worst junkyard encounter with a none human that I ever has was with a snake.
The damn thing slithered out of nowhere and I jumped into an Econoline van to get away from it. I sat in there for 20 minutes I was so scared.
I heard later on it was probably a harmless black snake.

 

I have a set of those quiet shoes. They have saved me from many a junkyard dog, and they are very comfortable!!!

 

We're gonna start calling you Marcus.

Reminds me of the story justinm told us a few years ago about buying parts in Oakland...
Sam.

 

Nads....great story....
the shephard/werewolf mix......dude had me rolling...that's funny, I can see it now

 

There used to be a bunch of auto recyclers out in Lakeside, California (about 25-miles east of San Diego). One time I was out there with my friend Mike and pulled a decklid of a VW open and there was the biggest friggin rattlesnake I had ever seen in my life! Rattlesnakes were a pretty common site, but this f-ing thing was huge! I simply and quietly lowered the decklid back down and proceeded to run my fat ass right the hell back to the truck. I think I might have peeled out in my boxers a little bit, too.

 

OGNC I used to hit some of those yards out there.....thats some desert shit mang!!

 

I had a pretty good Junk Yard dog experience when I was growing up in Northern IL. I was getting an S-10 rearend from a bigger late model yard. Any way, the guy at the desk tells me all the S-10's are way in the back & he'll just give me a ride out there so we can look at 'em. So we jump in their '83 buick roadmaster junkyard cruiser & take off like a bat outta hell through the long rows of junk. We're doin’ about 35mph & I look out the window and there’s the yard dog shepherd lab mix mutt hanging right with us... I tell my chauffer that they got one fast dog. He replies, "Yea but he's stupid as hell...watch this..." So he slows down a little bit & the dog gets out in front of the car about 5 feet and just stops! My chauffer, with out even thinking about brakes runs the dog clean over & the roadmaster spits him out the back like some kind of dog killing machine... The dog jumps up after rolling & tumbling a few yards & is right next to the door doing 35mph again...Needless to say I about shit myself & the guy never even looked over at me or cracks a smile...I say, “so this happens a lot?” Chauffer replies, “Third time today.”

BYC

 

No shit man! I came down the back way into Lakeside a couple months ago and all of those yards that were tright there off of Highway 67 are gone... At least the ones you used to be able to see from the road are gone

 

BYC, I kept looking for a punchline, (something like "his nuts were caught in the door) or somethign, but I guess there isn't one. That is one fucked up dog.

 

Now that's funny as hell,I'm still laughing,I'm at work,and there's not a fucking thing here to laugh at,but that story cracks me up...thanks

 

Deyo-
Nope, No punch line just a F'd up dog... And the rear end I got from em was just as bad as the dog....

BYC

 

Great story Nads!
Here's my jyd story.
Years ago I drove garbage truck for this dude. He had a big ol guard dog that was chained up beside the trucks.
My partner and I had to feed the dog one day. I had the food and he had the shovel to watch my back. I feed the dog, he's barking, my partner is yelling and waving the shovel. As we are retreating I turned my back for a second (bad move) the dog got me by the ankle.
Good thing for high top runners. So know I'm laying on the ground yelling, the dog is growling and I'm trying to claw my way to the end of the dog's run. I could see the line in the dirt and was trying to shake him off and regain my freedom.
Just then the boss comes out to see what all the yelling is about. I yell at him to get the dog off me, he's laughing and says quit playing with the dog!
I finally got loose, with no help from him.
I just layed there in the dirt with my heart trying to jump out of my chest.

 

Barn Yard that was funny as hell, I just about spit my beer out! I think I got a dog with those kind of smarts sitting right next to me .

 

"chopper, sic balls!"

 

Grrrrr!!!!!

 

A few years ago -I stopped by this biker guy's house I know to see what new stuff he had in his collection...I ride up on my motorcycle,and stop.I casually get off and walk up to the back door.I am just about to reach out and knock when I heard a rattle of some chains.
I decided to bail and jumped backwards out towards my bike.
out of a shed comes this animal about the size of an angus steer at full speed towards me....I am shittin my pants now-and this sonofabitch hits the end of the log chain he's tied to and it flips him over backwards about three feet from ME,
I MEAN THIS DOG[i think dog] Was a mix of a Great Dane sized dog-black with short wiry hair and a BIG blocky squarish head.IT SCARED ME SO BAD -I just got back on my bike and left shakin all over!NEVER WENT BACK.

 

I stopped at one of my local yards a few months ago.I ask the guy if I can look around.He says"sure,just don't get close to the black dog".So,I proceed to walk around looking out for the dog more than looking at cars.I then see a bad ass black dog way over at the other end of the yard.I feel safe now.I walk more,now looking at cars.As I round the end of one of the rows I'm greeted by yet another black dog.He was on a chain,so I just got the hell away!At this point,I wanna get the hell out of this place!How many black dogs do I have to watch out for?I'm now parinoid and looking at how far away from my truck was.As I get closer to my safe zone,I see a black mass come at me from between some cars.I'm now running!Jump in my truck,look back to see a small black goat looking at me.

 

I walked into the office of an old wreckin yard, when I was a kid. I looked down, and this German Shepard was lickin his balls. I looked at this old guy behind the the counter and said "I wish I could do that" And he said "ya might want to pet him first"...........OLDBEET

 

Not a Junkyard dog..., but he does quallify!

My friend and I rented an old farm house and our neighbors dog had some pups..., being the good neighbor we were we took one home as a pet and named him "Boomer".

This pup was a "Bull Mastiff"/"Black Lab" Mix..., needless to say he grew into his HUGE paws!!!! 240 pounds of playful puppy!!!

We couldn't keep him in the house because our furniture would dissappear while we were away...,(snack food for him) so we used a 30 foot logging chain bolted to a SBC out by the barn (that'll hold him!)!

It seemed to work for a while..., until one day I pulled into the drive and I saw Boomer dragging that small block across the yard literally "Furrowing" huge ruts and heading right towards the car at a pretty good clip!!

When he hit the down hill grade he picked up steam and now the SBC was bouncing right behind him..., He jumped up to the drivers window with a thud and the engine wacked the front bumper!!

Felt like the car was going to roll over!!!!

He wouldn't bite anyone but he'd crush you with LOVE...! (Just as Dangerous!)!!

 

Did that junkyard dog happen to be wearing white tights with the word "Thump" written across the back of them? And did said Dog attempt to head butt you?