stupid stuff we have done, and survived...

Senior year of high school a buddy and I pulled his rear drive 70s corolla into the art classroom through the giant double doors in the corner and procede to do an incredible stationary burnout right there on the tile floor and out the door. It was snowing like crazy outside and like 12 degrees. This was just before 0 hour so we left the scene until our first class started. We come back to school like nothing happened at 1st hour and go to art class. We see all of the windows open, the teacher bitchin' about the cold and smell and we start actin' all interested in what happened and if they knew who it was. We could barely hold ourselves together for that hour. It was nuts. We never got caught....

 

I had one unfortunate incident lead to another. The hood of my '51 Ford got a little tweaked when it came open after hitting a good sized pothole. Just tweaked enough to where I didn't trust it and used a ratcheting tie down for insurance. Well I ran out of gas one night. I had a gas can with me so i put it in the tank and just had to start the feed to the carb. I popped the hood and sprayed a shot of ether in the carb and cranked it over. Had to do this 2 or 3 times till it started. Well this is where it gets ugly. The tie down was hanging from the hood. Once the fan started spinning it just sucked that ol tie down in and I swear it looked like the car was eating its own hood. Not my proudest moment.

 

"may have gotten some drain bamage but that is yet to be determined... "

Coffee thru the nose on that one!

 

Back in high school I was under a full size Chevy that was up on ramps. I was disconnecting the driveshaft at the companion flange, and had one bolt to go. I'll never forget that "clink" sound as the bolt came free and the car, now no longer held in park, started rolling backward off the ramps. It still amazes me that I was able to shoot out from under the car before it came crashing to the ground. Dumb, dumb, dumb, and it could have killed me.

 

used to work in a big salvage shop testing engines , they would put the engines through a big hot washer and then i would start them on a bench. warm them up test oil pressure and compression and drain the oil and send them on their way. Used to do 5 - 10 engines a day.
A aftermarket turbo with a carb package on a 350 came in, I was getting it started and it was wet. Normal as it goes through the washer. It was barking poppong and bacfiring. I was working over the engine and Bang. The next thing i remember i was getting off the floor . the guy i was working beside was getting out from behind his tool box. The engine had an internal crankcase explosion both steel valvecovers were just hangind by a a bolt each right off the motor. the oilpan was balooned out, Never did find the dipstick. didnt hear too good for the rest of that day.

 

Stupid stuff? I specialize in that....around '62 was working for Blair's, hauling 110 gal of nitro up the Harbor Freeway in a 41 Ford truck, hear a knocking sound, send rod through pan, coast off freeway in cloud of blue smoke...leave the nitro overnight in the truck (Watts), and come back the next day with Blair's pickup and a logging chain...chain the big truck to the pickup, Phil Brown drives the pickup, and I drive the stake truck, we agree that I brake for both of us...so we get up to 65mph on the Harbor Freeway, two trucks chained together, 110 gal of nitro, then Phil signals me to start braking...it was only then when i realized that they were vaccuum-assisted brakes, no engine, almost no brakes ... Phil panics as we come to the Santa Monica turnoff, and slows, I have no choice but to pass him, chained together...nothing I can do as we go side-by-side on the one-lane offramp but wave to him next to me...never forgot the look on his face...needless to say we made it back, but this must win us a stupid trophy somewhere!

 

Stupid stuff....broke the rear end mounts on our Chassis Research TE-440 (in my avatar)...should have gone home and welded them back or replace them, but that is not what stupid people do...we took the logging chain from the above story (it was still in the back of Blair's pickup, and chained in the rear end, and then drove it...this was a slingshot style so the rear end was right next to my privates...made 2 runs on it...it did stay in, or I wouldn't be here to tell the story...

 

"to poggy" a term used in Buffalo meaning to grab a bumper of a moving car and slide on the snow and ice covered road........until the snow runs out...wearing extra clothing always helped
acetylene bombs......remote detonation.....gallon milk containers....battery....race rainout........record 5 cops cars......we were on the roof.....laughing
best one: race rainout.......antifreeze by the stop sign in front of my house.......watching the burnouts from my garage....laughing....
stupid is as stupid does

 

Had a few when I was younger that stick out. Two of which involved the same go cart. First incident happened when a buddy and I thought it would be cool to bury the gas pedal while driving down the gravel road he lived on. We thought it would be cool to hit the Y intersection wide open and jerk the steering wheel to the left. You know like in the movies and slide around the change over. Didn't account for the loss of traction and the force that would push us straight across the road and into a stone retaining wall. Did I mention no helmets or any precautionary equipment for this stunt. Ended up hitting the wall and flipping upside down with my face about 2 inches from cleaning the rock wall.

The next was same go cart about 2 years later. I used to use it as my source of transportation before I got my license. So I would drive it down the tar and chip road to my cousin's house. On the way back home, I was getting hot so I thought it would be okay to adjust my jacket sleeves while driving up a hill. Driving with one hand, I pushed up my sleeve only to hit a pot hole in the road. The jolt pulled the steering wheel and shot me across the road. I broke an eight inch cedar fence post and 3 strands of barb wire with my arms. Came out lucky with only a scratch on one hand and some dirty pants.

I worked at a body shop after tech school. I was helping with some frame work on a ford ranger. Pulling the front right frame rail to the side. I moved a few feet to check the door gap when the large hook we were using slipped off. The hook and chain flew passed my face and stuck in the metal wall beside me. Made me think twice about where I was standing the next time I worked on the frame rack.

 

Joined the Guard because my friends kept telling me what a rocking good time it was. The year was 1987.

On 26 FEB 91 I learned why they always said "never volunteer for anything"

No regrets, helped out a Ranger unit, tore up some USAF equipment doing it.

 

You had nothing to worry about A10's are indestructible... , I love seeing warthogs come down the runway at work, they sound like a pack of harleys.

 

I will try to keep it short... I was doing brakes on the 57 couple years ago, torqued the lugs on with the impact...not knowing the circuit breaker the compressor was on had popped and was running low on pressure the next day went to pick up a fourwheeler loaded it in the bed, was making a left turn on the way home the left rear fell off...thought the quad had fallen out of the bed! scared the crap out of me.... lesson is...dont use a impact to put lug nuts on...

 

I haven.t seen a dr in 10 years,thats the stupid part. Last week I had a heart attack while working on my car..That is the survival part. Oh there is other ones but this was the closest to not surviving. Jack

 

Someone said that there is a very fine line between brave and stupid...I'd say you were on the brave side!

 

There was almost no Rodders Journal. On July 4th 1977 Steve Coonan, lived in my shop. As a annual stunt I would fill up a ballon with oxygen and Acetylene and go out in the middle of the street at my house and set it off, very loud explosion. This year I decided to go big. I got a plastic 35 gallon trash bag and went to my shop. Steve was upstairs in bed my brother was working on his car and a employe was draining gas out of his gas tank in front of me. I unhooked the gas hoses from the bottles on my flame cutter. I was standing in front of the flame cutter and stuck the hoses in the bag and turned the bottles on. My brother was now standing in the walk in door in the roll up door, the other guy was in front of me under his car still draining gas. The gas was filling in the bag but the majority was staying at the top, so I moved the bag in front of me so I could push the gas down to the bottom of the bag to finish filling it. What I didn't think of was something called static electricity ! As soon as my arm got close to the bottom of the bag it exploded. It blew Steve out of bed, blew my brother across the alley, blew my employee out from under the car and blew the gas can out with him butt didn't egnite, God only knows why it didn't go off. It picked me up and over the flame cutter, about 7' high and slammed me into the wall. I was out cold, when I came too, Steve and my brother had carried me out side and laid me on the hood of my brothers car. I was moaning about my legs so they were rubbing them but when I woke up completely awake it hurt so bad they stopped. I pulled my jeans down and every pour in my legs was bleeding from the concussion. I believe we all would of been killed if the 20 gallons of gas would of gone off.
The End

 

I was Married ...............................twice

 

I have one that combines extreme intelligence at a young age...... with total dumb ass!
At about 5 years old I found a 22 bullet in the house.... OK brilliant part,,,somehow I understood how bullets go off. Dumb part..... went to car port. put bullet on the concrete, stood on steps and dropped a big rock on bullet. scared the shit out of my mother. she still tells the story.......

 

They can be shot with a BB gun, too. Just lay the bullet on the sidewalk, take aim with the Red Ryder, and KA-POW. Still have the mark on my neck . From the shell. The lead stayed right there. On the sidewalk.

Ben

 

Driving like a maniac in my roadster. HRP

 

I've survived alot of learning events. Stupid maybe but learned alot.

 

Turned a 1940 sedan on it's side to cut the frame out a few years back like we all did back in the day - with my about 260,00 mile Dodge Dakota on a slight incline....pretty sure I set the emergency brake etc....and as it rolled back gently into the 1940....I said damn that was close....

 

I remember this very well, the speedo needle and the white knuckles. Thought really hard for a while about trying to buy that 120mph roadster.

 

Look closer, it's sitting on 130 mph.

I wish I still had that car but I can assure you it would never see that mark again. HRP

 

In our little town we had a “ town cop” ,actually several of them over time, usually the village idiot. One had a reputation of chasing hotrodders in his stock Ford pickup.
One day many moons ago, while sitting in my apartment in a neighboring town with my college buddies, our booze soaked minds hatched a plan! Let’s go get him to chase us! ....What could go wrong???
I drove a blue car we can’t talk about here, but my buddy, not known in my town , drove a fast back version green and a year newer! So we took his! Mike and Mike were in the front seat, me in the back. We stopped right out side of town and muddied up the tag. Put the plan in motion..... drove by the cops house , he’s home, come back by, stop in front of his house and smoke the tires, stop back up, wait... wait.. he comes busting out of his trailer house, badge in one hand and a 45 Government in the other, .... and starts shooting at us!!
Well, we didn’t bargain for that! Mike, dropped the hammer on that car and we were out of there, took the back road back to my buddies place and parked that car in his garage for several days.

Well three days later, I have to talk to my Mom at the High School in my town where she worked. When I came out there was about forty kids around my car! I asked what the heck? They said they were looking for bullet holes in my car! I acted dumb and said “ wadda mean”. They all said the cop was bragging that he “ shot up “ MY car! I said you see any bullet holes? And drove away.


Never did understand why he thought it was me?? He he he








Bones

 

I was 12 and already a super-duper-fabrication specialist. I took an engine from a Yamaha YZ 250 that I had broken the frame on, and meticulously engineered it onto an old go cart frame with booger welded motor mounts, the shift rod lengthened to two feet long, the clutch handle zip-tied to the bat-mobile styled steering wheel, a high tech throttle consisting of clothes line tied to the foot actuator, and what could only have been described at Flinstone brakes because you know, who needs brakes, I can always work on that later. Well the Wile-E-Coyote SUPER GENIUS that I am decided to take the go cart off the same "Sweet jump" that had broken the YZ's frame in the first place. Did I care that the YZ had a suspension that is designed to soak up jumps and that the go cart had NO suspension? Did I care that the horsepower of that two stroke magnificent bastard of japanese machinery was 10 times that of the little lawn mower type engine it had replaced? Did I care that not only did I snub my nose at actual brakes, that I had also poo-poo'd the idea of a return spring on the high tech throttle string? No, I was certain of my mechanical engineering superiority! Not only did I not care, I didn't think about it until I was about 15 feet off the ground looking down and watching the normal landing zone just whiz by. When I looked up to see where I was actually going to land, I was greeted with a large oak tree stump that had graciously donated most of it's trunk for filler for the aforementioned "Sweet jump". .0003 seconds before I made contact with the stump, I heard Waylon Jennings narrating in my head, "Well, it looks like he's in over his head this time."


When I woke up my kidneys were between my shoulder blades and I had to unbutton the top button on my shirt to see. Well that last part isn't true but I felt like it was. And that, my friends, is where I learned to bolt up ridiculously powerful stuff to older, withering piles of crap and go out and have fun, in other words, how to hot-rod stuff.

 

Well that oughtta learn ya! LMAO

 

Drunk driving. Glad I outgrew it. I can remember doing 130 going over this 2 lane Tennessee River bridge with my buddy in the seat next to me and so drunk that I was using both lanes...just stupid.
But even sober I seemed to like to drive 130. That was how fast I was driving down I85 in Charlotte NC back when I was trying to impress my soon to be wife. She must have been dumber than me because she still married me. Last time I was in Charlotte though, I see that you can't drive like that anymore.

 

I love! “Look closer HRP says” ......”I was going 130 mph!!!”

 

We was just playing! Geezees!






Bones

 

Last week I was getting my trailer ready to tow a car to a show and needed some wood blocks to elevate the rails on my trailer. I set up the rip fence on my table saw and used the miter gauge to push my 2x4 through the blade to make 3.5" blocks. Each new block would push out the prior block until I cam to the last block which stayed wedged between the spinning blade and the rip fence. As I looked up to grab my push stick the blade fired the block at my left eye. I ran out of the shop with my hand over my eye thinking I had major damage. Miraculously I only had a shiner and no other injury. I will always were eye protection from now on.