Event Coverage Things I Found In My Car At The Pileup And On The Floor in Cerro Gordo

it's been a while since i've been 'inside' a show, and i kinda forgot what winds up in your car after a long day with the windows down. here are some highlights of things in my car from saturday.

1. before we turned off the interstate and headed toward taylorville, where o'rielly's, jack daniels and jimmy shine are revered, we stopped for a nutritious breakfast of jack in the box tacos...



2. we got to the gate and got this...



quite a coincidence that the only other pileup i brought a car to, was in 2005, when the t-shirt featured a stand-up b***! karma? fate? a call from Cthulhu that The Great Old Ones would soon rise? who knows, but i ****ing hate black t-shirts, so i stole kingch***is' sticker instead.



3. got stopped briefly for this...



holy ****balls. my rat rod is on the web. WHAT?? i can connect with other people that share my intense hatred for billet and shiny ****? WHAT? i can find rat rod events in my area? how totally awesome is that!?! **** YOU! the only things i hate more than black t-shirts and chrome smoothies are rat rods and the person that convinced lindasy lohan to dye her hair (i miss you, my sweet, ******-slipping, red-headed tramp).

BOO!



YAY!



4. i thought the guy spreading these out on the floor of a certain garage in cerro gordo was engaging in some sort of performance art, but i was even more confused when i actually tried to read it...



i wish i could decipher this thing, but most of the people who worked on cracking the german enigma code are dead, so i'm afraid we'll never know exactly where the slumfest will be and whether or not michael jackson will rise from the dead to perform the thriller dance once again.

while i was in cerro gordo, i learned a few things.

a. coby (from church magazine), is as handsome as tom wopat, and as cuddly as a baby otter.

b. keith weesner is intense. to the point of intimidation. maybe it's the tiger tattooed on his forearm, but that guy scares me. definitely not somebody to **** with.

c. tim strange watches almost as many dumb tv shows as i do.

d. mike zenor is nearly seven feet tall and loves starburst fruit chews.

e. johnny sparkle can cause permanent retinal damage if you stare at him for too long. that's why being sparkly is way cooler than being shiny.

f. plowboy owns all 17 Spinal Tap albums, including 14 of the fictional releases.

g. you can play a cover version of Quiet Riot's "Bang Your Head" on an upright b***.

h. my friends are cool. i couldn't have been there without them.

 

I like shiney.

Really though, is it shiney or shiny?

 

Spyder motor wheels kick ***!

 

BUHAHAHA. you never did figure that thing out huh?? i thought for sure you'd "crack the code" in no time.

...and amen on the Lyndsay Lohan thing.

 

Sorry, what was that? I saw something about ****s!!??

 

x 3 on Lohan...............sounds like a ****ed up party with Plowboy and crew........just as it should be!

PS, Can you send me a coppy of that Rat Rod flyer? Carla used to work with "developementally disabled" tar...I mean folks and they would love that. Correction, just saw a news article that the Government says we have to say "intellectually challenged". WTF? I will leave the prez outta this post

 

god damn it i thought i was special, cause my rat rod was chosen also, but i guess it just ain't so...
good talking with you again and congrats on getting behind the wheel again in a older car.

 

****
Would read again !

 

SLUMFEST or Bust..

 

Nice. Now this how a person should post about their hunnert trip.

 

wait whats wrong with black t shirts?!

 

I'm with johnny bondo...wazzup with the black shirt hatin? Beyond that, these posts are missing lately. Thanks 'flake. Wait a min, I wasn't callin you a flake just sayin, uh, ****.

He'll probably send weesner after me now...

 

Black T shirts don't show the grease or the blood.....

 

That was funny. The only that could possibly be better than Slum Fest would be **** Fest!

 

You ratrodderz are all the same!

That's some funny **** right there.








BTW...Is my rat rod on the web??



******Knuckles

 

Freckles on her ****IES !!! >>>>.

 

HAHA I could watch that Lindsay clip all day......

 

I was hoping that you had some pictures from my house Steve, because I would like to see some of the people that were there, because I sure as hell don't remember!

I am not sure where Slumfest is either, I am not sure who laid the flyers down to even ask......

 

What kind of self respecting Rat Rodder uses comic sans anyhow?

 

M.F., now you funny too! What is your plan for the slumfest, can we caravan, is camping allowed, can bon-fires be built, is it poor taste to wear a thong under my halloween costume? I could go on and on, but you got the drift, I gotta go smudge up my whitewalls, and mount the seven cow skulls on the Ranch Wagon. Toodle-do. ~Sololobo~

 

Monsterflake, thanks for the morning laugh. I will be sending you a black t-shirt with a big Chrome reverse wheel on the front & blonde coke ***** LL on the back.

 

I was wondering about slumfest, too. Putting the location on your event flyer should be a priority.

 

WOW...thanks for that...reminds me of the good old days of the hamb. You rule

 

**** Fest? Do you get a box of condoms and a free penicillin at the gate? If so, sign me up

 

Lmao . Post of the year !!!!!!! That snickers i ate for breakfast now hurts.

 

Funny ****..........................the redheaded LH is definitely my fave. When you guys figger out where slum****fest is, please post. I need a new place to avoid at all costs.

 

You could have left out slumfest and all , just had a picture of the taco and lindsey shakin the jumblees and you still would have got my vote for post of the year .

 

Haha, I got the rat rod photo thing too. WTF? My cracked windshield didn't help matters, but I bet when that guy saw where my amp had hit the rear quarter gl*** and spidered webbed it the night before, it sealed the deal. Whoopeee!

Coby = Tom Wopat. That is hilarious. Equally fitting that the square in Clinton looked a little like Hazard County.

 

Great meeting you and your posse Steve.

And the party at the Plowboy Mansion was amazing. Bang your head. I also think I heard a song called "Matt took a ****".

 

In the land of milk and chrome smoothies.