What's the Most Absurd Claim you've heard at a Car Show, Drag Race, Cruise Night, etc

In October of this year my loud mouthed buddy and I went to a restortion shop and I stood there dumb founded as he told this guy who had done some famous cars how he was building his car also. He went on to say that it was in the paint shop now and after it left there it was going to a guy that's doing the wiring and AC then to antoher guy for uhpolstery. the famous guy just laughed and my buddy never figured it out

 

What's the Most Absurd Claim you've heard at a Car Show,

My Rat Rod is probably safer than your truck because it has disc brakes! HRP

 

Maybe doesn't quite fit into this category, but funny just the same. Around here we have this guy that is beyond bullshit. If yo u added up all the things he is supposed to have done (SeaBee, Seal, Helicopter warrent officer, Arizona Highway Patrol driving and Firearms instructor, CSI, etc., more bullshit) This guy would have to be over 150 years old. As it happened he was in my shop some months back along with a couple of other buddies and I told this story about when i was a teen in Seattle street racing. It was kind of a funny interesting story and we all got a kick out of it. About four monts later this beyond bullshit dude is in my shop along with one of the guys who heard my original story and bullshit dude tells us this story about when he was a teen in Long Beach street Racing. He was telling my story, somehow it became his. My buddy and I just stood there and laughed at each other. Bullshit dude never did get it.

 

"its got a posi rear end not a limited slip"

 

Can't tell you how many high school dillweeds would tell me they were going to Kearney Drags this weekend with their 13-second basically factory stock (insert base Camaro, base Mustang, etc. here). When you ask for their time slips on Monday, it was usually 18, 19, 23 seconds with the usual explanation of bad gas, worn tires or whatever. One kid (one of the worst offenders) had a 68 Mustang and borrowed a pair of 9" slicks, only to find out after the bleach box burnout he had to ride the clutch for the first 50 yards to keep from killing it. It was actually 2 seconds faster on street tires, but never faster than 18 seconds. Sad part is my old man's 67 Ford Galaxie 500 with the 289 2 barrel would keep up with most of them in our unofficial 1/4 mile.

Probably the worst offender was the resident know-it-all who knew a guy that, in the early 60's was driving a brand new Chrysler Imperial type car (basically a tank with fins) from the factory to a dealer in Southern California. He was driving along at 60 mph when something just didn't feel right, so he got into it a little bit causing the transmission to shift down 3 gears and the rear tires to spin. Miraculously, the car straightened itself out and a little while later, still cruising at 60, floors it just to see what it's really got. This time, the transmission shifts down 5 gears, and the front end came off the ground, dragging the rear bumper down the highway for 1/2 mile. The guy also made a stop at the salt flats, claimed that the car will do 180 easy, and that steering at that speed was useless because there was no weight on the front end. The guy finally makes the delivery and tries to buy the car on the spot, but is refused - the dealer tells him it was built special for some testing the dealer is supposed to perform.

 

A guy with a very nice looking and sounding 70 Mustang with a built 460. Very nicely detailed,idled very crisp and would lightem up at will. I asked him if he has ever ran it through the quarter to see what it would do and he said "Oh No Man, with all the torque this thing has I'm afraid it would rip the bolts outa the frame" If I could of done a good Chubbaka imatation that would have been my response.

 

When I was in a high school a buddy of mine knew I was a car guy and insisted I come over and check out his dads t-bucket. So one day after school we ran ny his house car was a glass t-bucket with a sbc,alum. slots,kinda of a lime green paint. It was an ok car I reckon but when he pointed at the master cylinder and proceeded to tell me that was the super charger I had to walk away shaking my head lol.

 

it used to be fun to watch

 

Maybe so ...but looking at your personal information , they help put the peanut butter on your table ..

 

Not a claim, per se, but a question. Invariably, wherever I am, no matter what I am driving OD/DD, rod, vintage bike, etc., somebody comes up and asks me "Is it fast?" Yeah, my 4x4 rock rig is fast, my Model A is fast, too, compared to glacier. So's my bike. It was the fastest production motorcycle, in 1965.

 

had a chopped , fenderless 36 buick coupe 20 years a go and parked it in the village in manhattan across from grandpa al muensters restaurant and i over heard some guy tell his girlfriend that the car belonged to al lewis aka grandpa..i laughed my ass off

 

...at Mason-Dixon dragstrip....guy had a 79-81 camaro....resto-mod type car....told me it had 4.10 gears in rear......so he says says " YA KNOW HOW I KNOW THEY'RE 4.10's? I say...how do you know? .....lmao...." ITS GOT 4 WHEELS AND A 10 BOLT REAREND " ....as proud as can be !!!!!!

 

I heard this on; My corvette is the fastest in these parts and my penis is 3/4" long.
Hahahahahaha.

 

Guy tells me his buddy's 'Cuda was so bad ass, when they took it to Salem (Quaker City Dragway) NOBODY WOULD RUN 'EM!!!!!!!

He a bad man....uh..huh..

 

There was a kid at a Cruise Night back in the late 80's or early 90's. Had a 74 Pontiac Ventura had a highrise sticking out of the hood. The car had no roll cage in it. So I stand there for a while as he tells me he goes to the Drag strip every weekend and it runs in the 8 second range. I let him talk as all these other guys are standing around. I then say to him So if you go to Scribner every weekend you must have seen my car there the Plain Label. He walks away got in his car and left.

 

“These are the original tires” said a guy with Coker whitewalls on a molested Model A.

 

Not really a claim more like un informed. I work with a guy who purchased a very nice 40 Chev Tudor that was built up in the US.
This is his first Hot Rod. While at an event he was asked what type of steering it had. He proudly announced to everybody it had a chrome idiot unit.
I just about pissed my pants, the next day I explained it was pronounced Ididit.

 

Well maybe not at car show but a swap meet... I was looking at some 35 Ford 5w stuff, and the guy with booth asked me what I had... some small talk and I told him a 35 5w, We started talking about power plants, and told him 283 Chevy with a Muncie 4 speed... shook his head , Ford in Ford kid.. LOL I laugh, and asks me what about kind of suspension. Dropped front axle, with parallel rear leafs... Tells me I should put IFS up front and a Jag rear set up in it... Oh it will drive much than that old crap... so much for Ford in Ford.

 

I had a deal just like yours guy said he give me 9 for my car. He comes back with $900. He says he hauls cars for the auto auction so he could get them for that all day long. I told him when he comes up with the other $ 8100 he can have this one. The car was a 2 year old monte carlo ss with 15000 miles, mint condition.

 

Back in the 80's I had a buddy with a nice 69 camaro Z-28 RS. He went to the local Chevrolet dealership looking for a motor part only to have the Chevrolet counterman bet him that Chevrolet never made a 302.

 

Those fuckers couldnt build a peanut butter sandwich!!!

 

I found it quite funny when I over heard two teenagers talking about my OT Fairmont wagon, I had a stupid big Ford sign in the rear window(Atleast that was the extent of my teenaged ricerness lol). Anyways, as they walk by the conversation goes like this:
Teen 1- "Hey, look at that cool wagon." Points at it.
Teen 2- "Yea thats sweet." Pauses for a second "To bad its not even a Ford..."
Teen 1- "Yeah.." laughs and they walk off.

I know it looks like a Malibu of the same era, but damn..

 

I guess the "most" absurd claim I heard was actually right here on the H.A.M.B.

 

I overheard a guy looking at my 261 six with Wayne valve cover set tell his buddy that the motor in my car came out of a cement mixer and that it must have a ridiculous amount of low end torque lol


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At that point, I would have HAD to have said something like "Yeah! I was talking to Mike the other day and, well... He said that he never really liked you."

The best one that I ever heard (of course this was in high school when we admittedly really didn't know any better); "My buddy has a Mustang that he drag races, and one time he built a motor with tons of horsepower and amazing amounts of torque. Once it actually hooked up really hard leaving the starting line and (because of the amazing torque) the Mustang did a barrel roll in midair a few feet off the starting line and flipped over onto its ROOF!!!"

 

His family lives 2 streets over from me.

 

In the mid '70's I owned a new Lotus Europa (small mid-engined glass British sports car, only 48 inches high at the roof). I was cruisin' my local McDonalds one night and a Chevelle pulled up alongside, driver-to-driver.
"What is zat?" he yelled over his exhaust.
"It's a Lotus."
"A wha???"
"A LOTUS."
"A wha???"
"A LOTUS!!! LOW-TUS!"
"A Nova?"
(pause) "Uh...yeah." and I drove away.

I could just see him telling his buddies that night that he saw the brand new Nova. :-D

 

Several years back, while making my weekly run to the news stand to pick up Car Magazines, one fellow in the store starts in on telling me all about his late fifties Mopar product, and how it has a 392 in it.....OK, all believable so far....then ho goes off on a tangent and tells me that 392's alone are worth AT LEAST $20K each!!.....so, I say "really, how many would you like to buy??"......he starts to sputtering and backtracking, and was out the door in record time

 

I did all the work myself!!!

 

I've heard several guys claim they had some sort of big race cam in their motor, as it set there idling smoothly at 500rpm. A guy I used to work with once had a beat up Olds Tornado. He claimed he took it to the strip sometimes and beat the rail jobs with it. ha ha ha --- Steve ---