History When is it time to get rid of all your stuff?

Like the rest of you guys I have too much stuff and no one really interested. I'm almost 65 and had 1 heart attack. Around here there are a lot of car guys but they are mostly as old or older and they have begun to sell their stuff. I sold three cars last month. On the one hand it feels good on the other not so much. Now a short story on getting rid of a life style. I am not sentimental ,but I sold my ranch a few years ago ,we made a living with our cows . When it came time to sell them and ship them I cried. So getting empty of things can be hard on you. Good luck and a long life to all of you

 

The older I get, the more I enjoy Saturday mornings.
Perhaps it's the quiet solitude that comes with being the first to rise, or maybe it's the unbounded joy of not having to be at work. Either way, the first few hours of a Saturday morning are most enjoyable.
A few weeks ago, I was shuffling toward the ba*****t shack with a steaming cup of coffee in one hand and the morning paper in the other. What began as a typical Saturday morning, turned into one of those lessons that life
seems to hand you from time to time. Let me tell you about it.I turned the dial up into the phone portion of the band on my ham radio in order to listen to a Saturday morning swap net. Along the way, I came across an older sounding chap, with a tremendous signal and a golden voice.You know the kind; he sounded like he should be in the broadcasting
business. He was telling whomever he was talking with something about "a thousand marbles". I was intrigued and stopped to listen to what he had to say.
"Well, Tom, it sure sounds like you're busy with your job. I'm sure they pay you well but it's a shame you have to be away from home and your family so much. Hard to believe a young fellow should have to work sixty or seventy hours a week to make ends meet. Too bad you missed your daughter's
dance recital."
He continued, "Let me tell you something Tom, something that has helped me keep a good perspective on my own priorities". And that's when he began to explain his theory of "a thousand marbles".
"You see, I sat down one day and did a little arithmetic. The average person lives about seventy-five years. I know, some live more and some live less, but on average, folks live about seventy-five years. Now then, I multiplied 75 times 52 and I came up with 3900, which is the number of
Saturdays that the average person has in their entire lifetime. Now,stick with me Tom, I'm getting to the important part. It took me until I was fifty-five years old to think about all this in any detail", he went on, "and by that time I had lived through over twenty-eight hundred
Saturdays. I got to thinking that if I lived to be seventy-five, I only had about a thousand of them left to enjoy. I went to a toy store and bought every single marble they had. I ended up having to visit three toy stores to round up 1000 marbles. I took them home and put them inside of a
large, clear plastic container right here in the sack next to my gear. Every Saturday since then, I have taken one
marble out and thrown it away. I found that by watching the marbles diminish, I focus more on the really important things in life. There is nothing like watching your time here on this earth run out to help get your priorities straight. Now let me tell you one last thing before I sign-off with you and take my lovely wife out for breakfast.
This morning, I took the very last marble out of the container. I figure that if I make it until next Saturday then I have been given a little extra time. And the one thing we can all use is a little more time.It was nice to meet you, Tom, I hope you spend more time with your family,
and I hope to meet you again here on the band. 75 year Old Man, this is K9NZQ, clear and going QRT, good morning!"
You could have heard a pin drop on the band when this fellow signed off. Guess he gave us all a lot to think about. I had planned to work on the antenna that morning, and then I was going to meet up with a few hams to
work on the next club newsletter. Instead, I went upstairs and woke my wife up with a kiss."C'mon honey, I'm taking you and the kids to breakfast."What brought this on?", she asked with a smile."Oh, nothing special,it's just been a long time since we spent a Saturday together with the kids. Hey, can we stop at a toy store while we're out?
I need to buy some marbles.... "

 

My dad has a neighbor with an incredible collection of old Harley's and other misc cool stuff. Very few people are even aware of this collection. He doesn't show them off, take them out or ride them. (he had a pretty nasty spill a few years ago).

He is getting up there in years and my dad asked him if it wasn't time to start selling some stuff off. He says he has no intentions of every selling anything, everything is cataloged and his wife can do with it as she pleases when he is gone.

 

I'm just gonna have it all buried with me. Seriously, my wife has been watching and knows what's what. You're lucky when you have someone who is interested in what you do. I also don't keep too much "junk" just what I need for the current project and of course the "cool" stuff to show off.

 

If you sell it all today, you'll live to 103.
Decide to keep it forever and get hit by a falling airplane propeller tomorrow.

 

I haven't read this whole thread, but if I make it thru til I'm old enough to have to worry about this, if my son isn't interested, I am going to befriend a younger person who I know is very interested in the stuff I have. Kinda like an apprentice, someone who I know will appreciate it for what it is. Who has taken the time to learn how to rebuild and restore these old worn out parts. And leave it all to him/her.....

 

That may be one of the best stories I've ever heard !!
It really puts life into perspective.
Thank you so much for sharing.

 

I agree w/ your thinking, you and I similar cir***stances, have started to reduce inventory, plan on traveling some to enjoy the $$$ w/ wife, rather than letting the " vultures" sweep in after I'm gone, have seen this happen too many times, Its been my sad experience in life to see how people will take advantage of situations/widows just to make a "deal" John

 

You have a nice finished Roadster and Coupe in a newly built, clean, organized garage/house. If you're still enjoying the cars and the displayed memorabilia AND don't need the cash, enjoy it and ride on!!! What's to worry about?

Most posts like yours involve a yard, buildings and sheds full of (hoards) rusty cars and parts that represent a ton of work to catalog and sell.
Yours is different-clean and finished and easy to market/sell. If your Wife and family members are not old car and memorabilia savvy, arrange to have a couple of close trusted friends be adviser's for your family when you p***. The Wife could simply use their expertise to market and sell at a pre arranged commission of the selling price of the items (ie; 10 %).

 

Very inspiring,I am looking at my wire top gl*** marble jar as I type this and I don't have enough.

I love the story and your response. HRP

 

I have to add my thoughts.....I'm just 56 and my wife is my best friend, we do a lot together. There was a show on cable T.V. called "Tiny House Nation" which was about living in a 500 sq. ft. or less house and the mental side of living with much less possessions. It got me thinking. I could sell my two hot rods, many old bicycles, tools and junk and still be just as happy doing things with my wife. I could still tinker out in the garage but the cars would be gone. I think there is a mental pressure to maintain two drivable hot rods.....they are never completely done. A break from the self inflicted pressure would be nice. On the other hand....I love my cars, and I'm sure I would miss them. I have listed most of my inventory so she knows approximate values of stuff. I don't have as much stuff as others, but I'm content with what I have......oh the decisions to make....maybe I need a third Hot Rod. Gary

 

I'm 34 and started ditching my stuff.


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There are a lot of good points made on this thread, but I think many of you are missing MY point: It is a BURDEN to have to deal with everything once you are gone! The whole "let my wife/kids/friends worry about it when I am gone" at***ude is pretty selfish. Sorry, but it's the truth. Here's why:
1. First there is all the emotional baggage of dealing with anything at all related to the deceased. Just cleaning out a sock drawer can be emotionally draining, let alone entire buildings full of stuff.
2. Then there is the worry about getting a "fair" or "good" price for everything. There is always a lot of guilt about selling stuff off in the first place, and no good way to alleviate it because the owner is gone.
3. Then there are the hours and hours and hours of actually dragging things out of their hole and dealing with each one. It is a tremendous amount of work. I took off two weeks and spent an entire week, all day every day, cleaning out my parents' ba*****t and garage, then another week organizing a yard sale, filling two huge dumpsters with broken **** that should have been thrown out 30 years sooner, listing stuff on eBay, and dealing with local dip****s who wanted to buy his car for pennies on the dollar (as if I were desperate to sell or something?). My brother, who lived right down the street, spent WEEKS after work and on weekends doing a lot of the same.
Most of the stuff laying around wasn't really worth much, and certainly wasn't worth hanging onto for 30 or 40 years.
None of this was fun.
All of it is saddening.
Most of it could have been avoided if Dad had just started selling things off, giving stuff away, and throwing stuff away BEFORE he was incapacitated. Not because he was expecting to die soon, but because NO ONE needs that much stuff laying around.

I never have more than one or two cars lying around. If I have extra parts that are worth little, I give them away. If I have parts that are worthless, I throw them away. If I have extra parts that have value, I sell them. My entire shop could be cleaned out in an afternoon, and one good add on Craigslist would make it all go away in a weekend.
And there is never, ever a part laying around that is worth thousands so my wife doesn't have to worry about being taken advantage of or missing out. But I always have a project going and a car to drive, with enough tools and parts to make it all happen. More than that is just hoarding anyway.

 

Well, I am not to that point by any means but could only imagine myself in this position. I have some friends in the latter years that are still working on cars and to be honest I know that they will never finish, and this is not meant as a derogatory comment towards them. I have thought of this before and have come to the conclusion that it does not matter if they ever finish the car or not, its the fact that it brings them happiness working on the car. It reminds me of the saying that its not the destination but the journey that is the most enjoyable. Where this ties to your situation in my mind is that if this stuff still brings you happiness than keep it. It would bring you more regret getting rid of it and looking back at it as a mistake. I would evaluate it and give knowledge to the next person on what to do with it as regards to selling and prices (so to speak a game plan for them) and hang on to it as long as it made me happy. I am sure we all have stuff we really don't need but in no way want to part with it either.

 

I think you have missed the point to a large extent.
Yes it can be some work clearing out and looking after an estate.

But the point you are missing is that your parents did what we all do, live and enjoy their lives to the full extent that they can.
For a lot of people the idea of getting rid of everything is just not an option.
It can be sad to go through someone's belongings, at the same time it can give you insight into their life.

To expect being able to just bury someone and walk away is very unrealistic and selfish IMO.

 

Has he recovered yet from being thrown through the window?

 

lots of interesting views. At 71 I have downsized somewhat and sold off some items. My wife knows what to do with the rest and knows contacts to help dispose of things. I have kids that would want some of this stuff and will get some of it-they all want the fuely but would have no clue how to start/drive it much less keep it tuned properly. As to getting rid of all of it--no way!!!! Plan to keep tinkering with 40's until I am immobile or gone. If she doesn't get what the stuff may be worth-no harm- no foul-won't effect her financial position enough to matter. I suspect she would keep the 40 around for a while and her 55. The 57 Fuely would go-too finicky and high strung for the average person. I can't imagine getting rid of everything and just wandering around aimlessly without something to do. I help friends with car builds to keep occupied and busy.

 

Your welcome. Funny thing.... I have loved this story for many years. And am getting closer to that magic 75, 13 more for me.... I never did buy any marbles. Maybe because I lost them a long time ago....

 

For some folks, it is the journey, NOT the destination.......

.

 

The way it should be!

 

Petejoe - so, I guess no hope for those of us that have been asked "have you lost your marbles?"

 

for the people who say it is a burden to get rid of the stuff for the family... selling items you got for free and ending up with wads of cash is hardly a burden in my book. maybe it depends on how much and what kind of junk you leave behind.

 

how about this;
1. you keep all your stuff and inheritors call the junk guy to haul it all away. = you were happy with your stuff till you died, and they had to make a phone call but lost out on some dough.
2. you sell off your stuff and inheritors have some extra money if you have not spent it = you would have been happier with your stuff, your still dead and the inheritors can party like rock stars.
3. you keep all of your stuff and the inheritors take the time to pick through for things they want and sell some of the stuff cheaply. =you were happy while alive, and they had to do a little work to earn some money, but could of got more. your still dead
4. you keep all of your stuff, the inheritors take the time to sell off everything for top dollar = you were happy till you died, inheritors worked for their inheritance. win win.....but your still dead.
5. you sell some stuff, keep the stuff that makes you happy, eat healthy and exercise, live long enough to annoy family and friends and to not worry about situations 1-4.... but in the end your still dead.

 

Damn, dude, did you read my whole post? I don't think anyone should get rid of everything, but I do think everyone should get rid of all the extra junk that just ac***ulates. I keep it all to a minimum at all times. One car, one project, and the tools and parts to make it all viable is all anyone needs. The rest is hoarding.
I have a friend whose Dad is seriously into Ford performance stuff from the 1960s. He has a building full of cars, engines, and parts. But he also has three gearhead sons and they have already decided what goes to whom when he dies. That is a very different situation than the original poster is asking about, where there is no clear heir who actually wants the stuff.
My real point, though, is that selling off a dead loved one's stuff is not fun or exciting, it is sad and adds to the grief. No one jumps up and down when they make a few hundred or a few thousand dollars selling off their dead spouse's or parent's belongings. Anyone who is happy to make money off of a dead loved one didn't love the dead person very much. And having to decide what to do with each thing is a lot to hand to someone who is grieving your loss in their life.
A serious alternative to culling the pile would be to arrange yourself for some third party to deal with it all. (An auctioneer, a good friend who doesn't mind the heavy load, a s****per or dealer, etc.) Someone who will just take everything at once and hand over a check.

 

The problem with keeping all your worldly treasures until the bitter end is your inheritors may be so traumatized they cannot part with your property,,,now this would never happen to me. My **** will be on the auction block as soon as the death rattles start but I met a widow with a mound of her deceased husbands vintage engines, transmissions and autos none of which she is ready to part with....15 years later! Not even a obscure transmission half buried in mud!

 

LOL!!...TB33ANDA3RD...
I think you nailed it.
I'll choose option #5.

 

I think this is a great topic with several great responses and something that I have already been considering at 42... I have been collecting car parts for 30 years now and in just the past 5 years or so have been getting rid of quite a bit of stuff not only so my wife and kids don't have to deal with it in case I don't see tomorrow, but also so I don't have it weighing me down. It already seems like I have to spend too much time on organizing, etc. the stuff I do have. I am by no means planning to get rid everything, but have gotten rid of quite a bit especially when I moved out of a 40x80 shop about 3 years ago into the 30x50 shop I have now. I really liked having a bigger shop, but I am liking having less stuff better. It just feels lighter and lets me better concentrate my efforts on fewer projects and spend the majority of my time with my wife and kids.

 

Damn, this is getting depressing. My mother in law will be moving into ***isted living on Monday. She has two sons who do absolutely nothing to help her. This leaves my wife and I to take care of everything.
Now for the bright side to all of this. The two lazy, do nothing sons have no idea that they've been cut out of their mothers will, leaving everything to my wife and a couple of her moms close friends who still help her.
Moral to the story. What goes around, comes around. And it may just bite you in the ***.
Little by little over the last 20 years, I've watched all of my direct relatives die. I have 1 cousin left on my mothers side. Between my wife and I, we've buried a bunch of people. We've done most of the work involved with burying them and liquidating their estates. By being the good relatives, we've come out on top in the long run. Those who have done little if anything to help have been the big losers.
I have 2 hobbies. My hot rod and lapidary work. All of my rocks and lapidary equipment are being split between my closest friends in that hobby. My mineral and fossil collections will be going to the local college geology department. If my wife outlives me, she knows what my hot rod and spare parts, and my tools are worth. If on the other hand my wife goes first, I'll sell off her collections and collection of expensive sewing machines. Then when I go, everything of mine, including the house will be donated to the local animal shelter to sell off. The few worthless, do nothing relatives thru marriage will get absolutely nothing.
Both my wife's and my funerals are already paid for. I expect nothing from relatives. I'll owe them nothing.

 

I will be attending the funeral of my best friend this coming Saturday, he died from esophageal cancer four days after he turned 63. Before he died, he asked m to sell some of his stuff so his wife wouldn't have to deal with it. I turned 60 this past summer, and in the last year have sold two of my projects that I realized I would probably never have time to finish, a '64 Dodge Model 440 2-door hardtop, and a 1940 Cadillac Model 62. Selling those two were hard to do, as I've had them both for 20+ years, but that said, they were in the same condition the day I sold them as when I got them, so it was pretty obvious to me that they were a low priority. Age does sneak up on you, and before you know it you see your father staring back at you in the mirror. I am continuing to sort through an immense amount of C.R.A.P. (Cherished Relics And Possessions) that will be sold off to make room in the garage, and to ease the burden on whoever has to ultimately liquidate the remaining hardware once I p*** on.

 

I have a 35 year collecting addiction. I also have a son-law but a little more intelligent. He is worried about not knowing what it all is. Things tore apart or pieces. My daughter has been around it enough to know not to give it away. My wife was probably with me when I bought it.
BUT.. With the economy, our age , health and the next generation not really interested.We are slowly going to thin the herd. Pick out some things to keep. Put money and effort into a couple cars we have and spend the time enjoying them. Not falling over and moving things that use to be fun.
Gas pumps with the guts out of them seem to get heavier with age.